Apr 22, 2016

How Will You Spend Your Heartbeats?

The most scarce resource you will ever have is your time.

But time is too intangible. Time is a thing that humans invented to organize our lives around. So I like to think of our time in terms of heartbeats.

You can feel your heart beating. It connects you to your body, and gets you out of your head. It reminds you of the blood pumping through your veins… at varying speeds… around the clock.

If you end up living something similar to the average human lifespan, you will be afforded 2.5 billion heartbeats throughout your entire lifetime. 42 million per year. Just over 100,000 per day.

So the question becomes… how will you spend your heartbeats?

How Will You Spend Your Heartbeats?

I believe that our choices influence the direction of our lives. Everything that we do has a ripple effect in our lives.

You will always, until the day you die, have a choice as to how you spend your heartbeats.

Will you choose to spend them criticizing and resenting your partner, or taking stock of how much you love and appreciate them?

Will you stay in an uninspired city, relationship, or career path exclusively because they’re the safe choice, or will you deploy the courage to go after what you actually want?

Will you primarily fill your body with toxins, junk food, and drugs, or vegetables, water, and nutrient-dense foods?

Will you fill your mind with self-doubt, celebrity gossip, and news that profits from you living in a state of fear, or will you fill it with skills, education, love, and self-compassion?

Will you put people down, be passive aggressive, and discourage people from being their authentic selves, or will you be a loving, encouraging, kind friend to everyone that you cross paths with?

Will you pack your calendar with constant busyness, or will you allow yourself regular downtime to let your soul breathe?

Will you say yes to everything and put other people’s opinions of you over your opinion of yourself, or will you set appropriate boundaries and only do things that feel light, expansive, and joyful?

Will you talk behind your friends’ backs, or will you regularly tell everyone in your life how much you love them and why?

Will you settle for a mediocre intimate relationship that just barely manages to scrape by, or will you put in the necessary work to allow your love life to be the ripe soil for your personal growth that it yearns to be in your life?

Your heartbeats, your decisions. Nobody can tell you how to live your life but you.

My only recommendation is to make sure that you live your life in a way that lets you sink your teeth in deeply, and have the juiciness of it drip down your chin.

Live with intentionality.

Give everything that you can.

The world needs you in all of your self-actualized glory.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
Your Lone Wolf Mentality Is Killing You
Aug 6, 2017
Jordan Gray
Your Lone Wolf Mentality Is Killing You
Do you consider yourself a lone wolf? If you do, I have a message for you... Our society is currently sick. People are feeling increasingly isolated and alone. Our sense of community has been eroded. We have been given the message that you have to look out for yourself, first and foremost....
Continue Reading
The Surprising Benefit Of Over-Sharing On Social Media
Oct 13, 2015
Jordan Gray
The Surprising Benefit Of Over-Sharing On Social Media
Over the past three years, I’ve discovered that I really enjoy writing. Like… a LOT, a lot. Along with this realization has come my personal practice of sharing a ton of super personal things on Facebook. Sometimes I was doing it to let off some steam… Sometimes I was doing...
Continue Reading
The Battle Between Your Work And Your Woman
Nov 5, 2014
Jordan Gray
The Battle Between Your Work And Your Woman
“A man’s life is a constant battle between his work and his woman.” I get asked the question “How do you find the balance between your work and your girlfriend/wife/partner?” on a weekly basis. Lets dig into what's really going on when a client asks me this. They’re feeling overwhelmed. They’re...
Continue Reading
How Perfectionistic Parenting Affects Children Later In Life
Feb 26, 2017
Jordan Gray
How Perfectionistic Parenting Affects Children Later In Life
Did you grow up with overly strict, controlling, or perfectionistic parents? Was familial conversation strained and limited? Did you frequently feel like you weren’t allowed to be yourself or express certain emotions? Every child experiences invalidation growing up. This is natural and unavoidable....
Continue Reading
The 8 Best Books About Men’s Development And Sexuality
Oct 1, 2019
Jordan Gray
The 8 Best Books About Men’s Development And Sexuality
I frequently get asked for my top recommendations for self-help books in the men's development and sexuality realm. So I decided to compile a list. If you don't want to read through the entire article and read about why I think each book is great, and see some of my favourite quotes from each one,...
Continue Reading
This Is Your Life Purpose
Oct 8, 2017
Jordan Gray
This Is Your Life Purpose
To feel alive... This is your life purpose. Spend time with people who make you feel alive. Eat food that makes you feel alive. Do work that makes you feel alive. Spend your money on experiences that make you feel more alive. Do things that make you feel alive. If the answer is...
Continue Reading