Apr 22, 2016

How Will You Spend Your Heartbeats?

The most scarce resource you will ever have is your time.

But time is too intangible. Time is a thing that humans invented to organize our lives around. So I like to think of our time in terms of heartbeats.

You can feel your heart beating. It connects you to your body, and gets you out of your head. It reminds you of the blood pumping through your veins… at varying speeds… around the clock.

If you end up living something similar to the average human lifespan, you will be afforded 2.5 billion heartbeats throughout your entire lifetime. 42 million per year. Just over 100,000 per day.

So the question becomes… how will you spend your heartbeats?

How Will You Spend Your Heartbeats?

I believe that our choices influence the direction of our lives. Everything that we do has a ripple effect in our lives.

You will always, until the day you die, have a choice as to how you spend your heartbeats.

Will you choose to spend them criticizing and resenting your partner, or taking stock of how much you love and appreciate them?

Will you stay in an uninspired city, relationship, or career path exclusively because they’re the safe choice, or will you deploy the courage to go after what you actually want?

Will you primarily fill your body with toxins, junk food, and drugs, or vegetables, water, and nutrient-dense foods?

Will you fill your mind with self-doubt, celebrity gossip, and news that profits from you living in a state of fear, or will you fill it with skills, education, love, and self-compassion?

Will you put people down, be passive aggressive, and discourage people from being their authentic selves, or will you be a loving, encouraging, kind friend to everyone that you cross paths with?

Will you pack your calendar with constant busyness, or will you allow yourself regular downtime to let your soul breathe?

Will you say yes to everything and put other people’s opinions of you over your opinion of yourself, or will you set appropriate boundaries and only do things that feel light, expansive, and joyful?

Will you talk behind your friends’ backs, or will you regularly tell everyone in your life how much you love them and why?

Will you settle for a mediocre intimate relationship that just barely manages to scrape by, or will you put in the necessary work to allow your love life to be the ripe soil for your personal growth that it yearns to be in your life?

Your heartbeats, your decisions. Nobody can tell you how to live your life but you.

My only recommendation is to make sure that you live your life in a way that lets you sink your teeth in deeply, and have the juiciness of it drip down your chin.

Live with intentionality.

Give everything that you can.

The world needs you in all of your self-actualized glory.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Jun 7, 2020
Jordan Gray
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Confidence is the deepest core desire of any man. It is the thing we yearn for above all else, whether we know it or not. It’s the drive hidden behind all of our conventional desires. We seek the high-paying job, the romantic partner, the fit body, or the emotional and psychological healing, because...
Continue Reading
The 3 Best And Worst Things To Say To Someone With Depression
Oct 1, 2016
Jordan Gray
The 3 Best And Worst Things To Say To Someone With Depression
I was sitting in my men’s group last night when one of the men revealed that he had been suffering with depression and suicidal ideation for the past several weeks. Without prompting, half a dozen of the guys in the room started to rattle off some of the least productive things that you can say to someone...
Continue Reading
9 Things Everyone Should Know About Money
Sep 23, 2018
Jordan Gray
9 Things Everyone Should Know About Money
I grew up in a fairly financially literate household. My dad was a serial entrepreneur with a high tolerance for calculated risk, and my mom was the more conservative one who had a mind for resourcefulness. In short, my dad earned and my mom saved, and they made a great match for each other...
Continue Reading
5 Tips To Hack The Male Brain: Understanding Men
Jan 27, 2013
Jordan Gray
5 Tips To Hack The Male Brain: Understanding Men
Understanding Men One simple thing that you can do to today to have less stress in your life (and maintain healthier relationships with women) is understand how your brain works. All men (and women) have a masculine side, and a feminine side. It is necessary to have both a masculine and a feminine....
Continue Reading
Kindling vs. Coal: How To Know If Your Relationship Will Last
Feb 28, 2016
Jordan Gray
Kindling vs. Coal: How To Know If Your Relationship Will Last
I recently had a new client ask me the following question… “So, I recently met this woman. She’s amazing. She’s everything I could have ever hoped for… and yet, I’ve never been so stressed out in my entire life. I find myself analyzing every little move that she makes. Interpreting every...
Continue Reading
9 Ways Anyone Can Instantly Be More Attractive
Dec 4, 2017
Jordan Gray
9 Ways Anyone Can Instantly Be More Attractive
With a title like 9 Ways Anyone Can Instantly Be More Attractive, you would think that I would pull a switcheroo and exclusively talk about the importance of feeling your feelings, self-love, character development, and being in integrity and generally feeling alive in your life. You know... things that...
Continue Reading