Apr 8, 2016

It’s Terrifying And Then It’s Amazing

I’m going on an airplane tomorrow. And I really, truly do not enjoy flying.

I know… it’s a modern miracle… and it’s all “WOW I’M IN THE SKY RIGHT NOW!”… but I can’t help but feel like we’re going to drop out of the sky at any moment. Even though that’s fairly impossible. And even though there’s a way higher chance of me dying from just taking a shower, I still find my heart racing when the plane’s wheels leave the ground.

But it’s worth it. Flying is worth it because on the other side of my tense forearms, anxious thoughts, and nervous poops is travel!

New places. New experiences. New lessons to be learned. New friends to connect with.

For me, flying in a plane is essentially always terrifying… and then what I get to do after the flying happens is amazing.

And that’s life. It’s terrifying, and then it’s amazing.

It’s Terrifying And Then It’s Amazing

Allowing yourself to truly dive into a new and promising romantic relationship can be scary… and then after a few weeks or months of dates and Do-they-really-like-me-as-much-as-I-like-them?’s, you settle into something beautiful and it expands your heart more than you ever thought something could.

Deciding to put it all on the line to start your own business is one of the most daring things that we can do with our lives. But if you truly allow yourself to dive into the exhilaration of the experience, you might end up building something that gives you a greater sense of freedom, fulfillment, and joy than anything else in your life (outside of your intimate relationship).

Being vulnerable in a conversation with someone you’ve just met is nerve-racking, but if you do it (with someone who feels trustworthy) then you’ll open up the opportunity for your conversation to go a whole new level of depth and intimacy when they choose to meet you in the deep end.

Diving into your greatest fear with your coach/therapist/self can be absolutely horrifying. Maybe you’ve spent years or decades running away from your fear. But once you’ve faced it, acknowledged the truth of the situation, and allowed yourself to move through the pain of it, you get to be free of it forever. A short period of pain, for decades of ease. It’s worth it.

Where in your life do you need to allow yourself to leap into something scary?

What terrifying thing is holding you back from moving into the next iteration of who you know you’re capable of being?

Remember, the terror is temporary.

It’s terrifying for a moment, and then it’s amazing forever after.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
What To Do When She Is Mad At You
Nov 5, 2013
Jordan Gray
What To Do When She Is Mad At You
Her arms are crossed. She’s stopped communicating with you entirely. She's reluctant to make eye contact with you… and when she does look your way, her gaze is hollow and icy. You rack your brain for what you could have done… What did you say? Did your flirty banter with that waitress over lunch go...
Continue Reading
How Your Childhood Is Messing Up Your Love Life
Feb 10, 2014
Jordan Gray
How Your Childhood Is Messing Up Your Love Life
Growing up, you were completely at the will of your parents. Depending on how much love, time, and attention your parents gave you, their involvement in your life undoubtedly affected how you show up in your romantic relationships. If they were there for you, never there for you, or too...
Continue Reading
Girlfriend Has Her Period? Here’s How To Be Awesome
Oct 18, 2015
Jordan Gray
Girlfriend Has Her Period? Here’s How To Be Awesome
If you have a girlfriend/wife/female partner, once every 28 days or so her uterus stages a revolt against her inside of her body. I’ve had my girlfriend explain to me what period cramps feel like, and it sounds like hell. The best way that I could summarize her description of her period (for...
Continue Reading
Why Being Needy Is A Good Thing
Dec 18, 2013
Jordan Gray
Why Being Needy Is A Good Thing
In western society we are raised with an independence-is-the-only-way mindset. And this does so much damage to us it's ridiculous. You walk down the street and see women sporting t-shirts that say "100% single" or "I don't need no man". You hear men bragging about how long they've been single for...
Continue Reading
3 Ways Men Energetically Castrate Themselves
Jan 11, 2021
Jordan Gray
3 Ways Men Energetically Castrate Themselves
For nearly any man, having their balls chopped off is one of the most terrifying scenarios imaginable. If you have a scrotum, just reading that probably made it flinch. But if it’s such a scary idea, then why do so many of us do it to ourselves every single day? To understand energetic castration,...
Continue Reading
7 Books I Am Currently In Love With
May 1, 2017
Jordan Gray
7 Books I Am Currently In Love With
A long-time reader of mine sent me an email a couple of weeks ago and asked me what I was reading. I decided to send my answer to my entire email list and the response was overwhelmingly positive. So, on that note, here are seven books that I have been really digging lately. If the description of...
Continue Reading