People love clinging to their excuses.
“I would have a six pack… but I just can’t find the time to dedicate to it.”
“I want to start my own business… but I’ve got bills to pay.”
“I want to travel the world… but I have kids/a job/a mortgage that keeps me in one place.”
Excuses are just our way out of taking personal responsibility for our own lives. It gives us the emotional payoff of feeling like the victim in our situation.
And while your childhood and upbringing are not on you, how you develop as a person throughout your life is entirely up to you.
Where There’s A Will, There’s A Way
When people find out that I spent several months traveling while writing my first three books, they find it hard to believe.
I’ve heard everything ranging from “What qualifies you to write a book?” to “Isn’t it time you settled down and got a normal job?”
The subtext of every objection to my life’s reality being “Your courage makes me feel inadequate because I feel like I could be doing more with my life.”
The good news? You can.
By following this simple goal-setting process every few months you will get transported into your ideal life faster than you ever thought possible.
How To Get Whatever You Want In Life
One of the most difficult steps for a lot of people in goal setting is committing to actually wanting it.
The underlying fear being “If I decide that I really want something and then I don’t get it, it’ll hurt that much more because I will remember wanting it that much more.”
Don’t coast through life hoping that you don’t rock the boat. BE the boat that speeds past all of the aimless people floating in the water and let your wake lift them up and inspire them.
So, truly, what does your ideal life look like? What would you fill your perfect week or day with? Get crystal clear on your goals and they will be that much easier to achieve.
2. Write It Down
There is a certain magic in having your goals being written down.
They’re more tangible. They stare you in the face. They dare you to take them on.
If you’re having trouble getting motivated with your goals, you might need to do what I call the “Intentionality Intensive”.
This is where you list ten reasons WHY you want each of the goals that you have written down.
For example, I had a tough time writing my first book because I didn’t have enough clarity around why I was writing them. After a quick intentionality intensive I realized that there were burning reasons why I wanted to write books that I hadn’t consciously thought of. I wanted to create a larger resource of information for my readers so I could affect thousands of people across the world daily. I wanted to stop answering certain questions as often and so I could point my readers to one easy solution. It wasn’t until I dug into my “Whys” that I got truly motivated on my goal. Once that was set, I wrote four books in less than a year. And it was frictionless.
So which of your goals need to be reinforced? Which do you want to believe in even more? Let them burn off the page with your intentionality.
3. Work Hard
To achieve your results, at a certain point you have to transition from thinking to doing.
One of my earliest mentors, Jim Rohn, once said that “You can’t hire someone else to do your push-ups for you.”
There is no complete outsourcing solution for the things that you truly want in your life.
Someone can give you the roadmap, but you still have to do the work yourself.
This is a trend that I’ve noticed in some of my youngest clients. They expect that just because they’ve hired me for coaching and accountability, that I will somehow do every step of the work for them.
There is no shortcut to success. And if you somehow find a shortcut, it’s usually best not to take it because then you miss out on the education and character growth that comes along with the lessons you would have learned along the way.
So do the work. Times a thousand. And then keep doing it.
4. Bless Those Who Have What You Desire
Any time you see someone who has what you wish to have and you verbally or subconsciously resent them, you put a wedge between you and your goals.
You see a guy driving the nice car that you want and you tear him down in your mind? You lose.
You see another guy with a gorgeous woman on his arms that you wish you were dating and you automatically assume he must be a jerk? You lose again.
It’s natural to not want to become that which you hate. So by hating or resenting the thing that you most want to become, you keep your results at arms distance.
When you see someone with that thing that you wish to possess, take a moment to respect them. Think “Wow, he must have worked really hard in his life to achieve that body/level of success/partner… good for him!”
Doing anything other than this will only poison your sense of integrity and keep you further from achieving your ideal life.
5. Appreciate It When You Get It
With money and intimate relationships, it’s easier to get what you want than to keep what you want.
When you do start to achieve your goals, make sure you slow down and appreciate them.
Celebrate the successes. Journal about your accomplishments. Brag to your close friends and supporters about how proud you feel to have levelled up in life.
By recognizing and appreciating your successes, you encourage them to stick around (whether we’re talking about money, love, or other, praise and appreciation is key to your emotional fulfillment).
How Badly Do You Want It?
You can have whatever you want as along as you actually want it, and you work for it.
By getting crystal clear on what you care about in your life, you can make it a reality.
The six pack of abs? You can wake up an hour earlier three days a week and work out with a trainer.
Want to travel the world but your kids are “holding you back”? I have friends whose toddlers have been to over twenty countries.
Want to have the kind of thriving relationship that others look up to? Prove it. Put in the work, and learn how to love your partner better.
The only limitations are the ones we place on ourselves.
The choice, as always, is yours.
Dedicated to your success,
Ps. Is one of your goals to have an amazing, thriving relationship? My newest book Keep Her Captivated: Lead Your Relationship To Its Maximum Potential was just released on Amazon and it’s kicking ass. Want to level up your love life in a massive way? Check it out.