Mar 10, 2021

Thank You For This

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you to the trees, and stars, and hot salty tears,

And my childhood guardians who let me hold on to their thighs so that I got my daily

touch.

Thank you to the women who held me through my pain.

To Libby and Linnea and Laura and Allison and Amy and all of the other names that don’t start with L’s or A’s.

 

Thank you watermelon red bite juice

for dribbling down my summer chin

 

Thank you dad

for reading us the same Christmas book every Christmas eve

your consistency infused my bones with love and safety and there is no greater gift I have ever received than your guidance and care.

 

Thank you body,

for somehow knowing how to turn ice cream into heartbeats and thoughts

and for having the intuitive sense to tell me when enough is enough.

Forcefully, when needed.

How my veins don’t burst when stretched is a miracle, as all of you is, every day.

 

Thank you Demetra

you golden hearted beauty

with eyes like winter ice piles and skin as soft and warm as a baby’s intent.

Your existence dances me open every day,

I can’t wait to raise children with you.

 

Thank you New York for teaching me

how badly I never want to live in New York.

 

Thank you food thank you music,

thank you every illicit drug I ever did that taught me what too much felt like.

Thank you to the resiliency of my young body that could somehow live off slushies and dollar-slice-pizza

how I somehow didn’t get melanoma after endless summers of skateboarding with friends for 12 hours a day is beyond me.

Suppose I photosynthesize.

 

Thank you Colin, for helping me learn young that I would never grow up to abuse my power over younger men

 

Thank you Queen Elizabeth Park and your scratched up surfaces

I will never assume that something is concrete before I touch it again

 

Thank you to the wisdom of my emotions that have

guided me

over and over

beyond my stubborn, society-and-strength-and-male-conditioned mind

and for the times that I have awoken in tears

deep guttural belly tears –

Imagine that – waking up sobbing because our bodies know better than our minds,

as they always will.

How could it be any other way?

 

And last but not least

thank you to you

Whether you are my mother, blood or surrogate,

A lover, past or present,

Someone who found me by searching the words ‘how to help out during my girlfriends period’ or ‘why shouldn’t I kill myself’ or ‘how to write a love letter that will make my partner cry’ or ‘ways to communicate with my wife better’…

what a beauty you are

thank you for your immense heart

thank you for your courage, for your desire to be a more loving more courageous more full you

Your existence is a love letter to the world, and I am so glad you are alive to read these words,

you absolute gift of a person

Blog

Related

See All
Modified Minimalism
Mar 5, 2013
Jordan Gray
Modified Minimalism
Modified Minimalism I am a huge fan of minimalism. Minimalistic decoration, minimalistic fashion, and most importantly, minimalism in terms of personal material possessions. I find the feeling of being able to live out of a carry-on bag very liberating.  The fact is, we can get...
Continue Reading
The Differences Between Boy And Man Psychology
Sep 3, 2013
Jordan Gray
The Differences Between Boy And Man Psychology
Do you ever have moments when you feel like a boy trapped in a man's body? We all do at some points in our interactions with others. You find yourself picking a fight over something insignificant. Or feeling jealous of another man's business success. Or becoming whiny when your partner says she's...
Continue Reading
The 3 Step Process For A Life Of Genuine Fulfillment
Nov 5, 2016
Jordan Gray
The 3 Step Process For A Life Of Genuine Fulfillment
The most persistent theme that I have learned throughout my life thus far, is that every decision ultimately comes down to our values. And we suffer or thrive to the degree that we have identified and live by our values. If you find yourself constantly second guessing yourself, living in your head,...
Continue Reading
7 Supplements That I Take Every Day
Aug 5, 2017
Jordan Gray
7 Supplements That I Take Every Day
Standing back and looking at the shelves of nutritional supplement sections can make you feel overwhelmed and stressed out pretty darn quickly. There are hundreds of different vitamins, nutrients, and compounds to choose from, each with thousands of producers and different label variations. To cut away...
Continue Reading
6 Ways To Save Your Struggling Relationship
Sep 7, 2015
Jordan Gray
6 Ways To Save Your Struggling Relationship
This one’s for all of you long-term relationship folks! While I usually tend to write about how to turn a good relationship into a great relationship (through things like connection exercises, date nights, sexual communication, romantic gestures, overall prioritization, and increasing depth in your...
Continue Reading
Your Lone Wolf Mentality Is Killing You
Aug 6, 2017
Jordan Gray
Your Lone Wolf Mentality Is Killing You
Do you consider yourself a lone wolf? If you do, I have a message for you... Our society is currently sick. People are feeling increasingly isolated and alone. Our sense of community has been eroded. We have been given the message that you have to look out for yourself, first and foremost....
Continue Reading