Oct 8, 2016

Vote With Love 1,000 Times Per Day

According to recent studies, you make approximately 35,000 decisions per day.

Throughout a 24 hour period, the thoughts run rampant in your head.

What do I feel like eating for breakfast today? How many times should I soap myself down in the shower? Which shoes should I wear? Should I leave him/her? Should I text my friend how grateful I feel for their presence in my life? Do I want to buy a pet? Do I know that person well enough to stop and chat with them or should I just keep walking? Should I change careers? Is this too much kale? Am I doing enough with my life? Am I a good enough parent/son/daughter/friend/partner? Should I engage in this argument?

The vast majority of all of the decisions that you make can either be guided by love or by fear.

Love would have you honour your creative impulses and do that project you’ve been wanting to do… while fear would have you stay safe, keep your head down, and keep doing the thing that pays your bills and simultaneously makes you miserable.

Love would have you slow down in the morning and write in your gratitude journal (and then send your gratitude to the specific people that you mention in your writing)… while fear would have you roll over in bed, immediately check your phone/social media to see everything that you’ve missed over the last seven hours, and reactively jump out of bed to get your day started, already feeling like you’re behind on life.

Love would have you trust that your significant other can be friends with their exes without you having to worry about it… while fear would assume that you can’t trust someone who your partner was once attracted to, and demand that they not go out for dinner with their ex, or else you’ll leave them.

Love would have you honestly tell someone, “I’m not in love with you, and I have to let you go in order to let you find your person,” while fear would have you grasp on to someone who wasn’t an aligned fit for you… for fear of being alone forever.

Love would have you reach out to that family member/acquaintance/friend/former co-worker that you held a grudge against and tell them how sorry you are that everything that transpired between the two of you, while fear would have you grip tightly on to your resentment and pride.

Your choice, day in and day out, is to vote with love.

You make 35,000 decisions per day… so aim to vote with love at least 1,000 times per day. That’s less than three percent of your actions per day. You can do that. Start there.

Be mindful of what your decisions are rooted in.

Are your intentions loving, or fearful? Are you guiding your life with love or fear? Are your relationships, career choices, and spending habits rooted in love or fear?

What rules your life?

Are you constantly worried about what the world is coming to? Who might become president? How screwed we all might be? Or are you concerned with the only variable that you can control… spreading as much love as possible through your daily decisions?

Simply put… are you bound by fear, or coming from a place of love as often as possible?

They’re your votes. Do what you will with them.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
8 Ways To Be The Healthiest Person In The World
Dec 21, 2017
Jordan Gray
8 Ways To Be The Healthiest Person In The World
Want to be the healthiest person in the world? Vibrant health comes down to a simple set of conscious choices. But in order to make those choices consistently you have to be able to take charge, stay awake, and push back against your own mind. When it comes to being in the driver's seat of their lives,...
Continue Reading
How To Find And Date High Value Women
Mar 13, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Find And Date High Value Women
As someone who has their life together, you want someone who brings equal value to your life. After enough disappointing dates you might find yourself craving a partner who is more challenging, more evolved, and more your type of people. Some of your friends tell you that you are being too picky,...
Continue Reading
All Relationship Is For Healing
Apr 26, 2015
Jordan Gray
All Relationship Is For Healing
The purpose of any and every relationship in your life is healing. Whether it’s the healing you’re aware of… your ex that you want to get over, your low self-esteem that you’re trying to raise, or your sexual confidence that you’re trying to boost. The healing you’re partially aware of… the lingering...
Continue Reading
7 Daily Habits That Have Contributed To My Success
Oct 7, 2016
Jordan Gray
7 Daily Habits That Have Contributed To My Success
Your habits make you who you are. This isn’t a new concept. What you do, you become. Small actions done consistently over time add up and become much larger things. Small things done over time add up into pleasure, joy, and comfort. Those same things neglected over time lead to pain, disease, discomfort,...
Continue Reading
How To Know If A Woman Is Attracted To You Or Your Lifestyle
Mar 17, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Know If A Woman Is Attracted To You Or Your Lifestyle
Tell me if this sounds familiar… I recently went on a date. And less than ten minutes into the date the woman sitting across from me asked me what I did for a living (a completely reasonable question). When I told her that I am a self-employed relationship coach and had written four books, she...
Continue Reading
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Jun 7, 2020
Jordan Gray
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Confidence is the deepest core desire of any man. It is the thing we yearn for above all else, whether we know it or not. It’s the drive hidden behind all of our conventional desires. We seek the high-paying job, the romantic partner, the fit body, or the emotional and psychological healing, because...
Continue Reading