Mar 5, 2016

Your Life Is A Garden

Your life is a garden. And it needs constant attention.

Your garden needs water, sunlight, effort, and love in order to truly thrive.

If you treat your soil well then nutritious foods and beautiful flowers will be able to spring forth, or… you can treat your soil badly and it’ll feel like nothing ever really blooms or flourishes in your world.

Be mindful of who you allow to plant seeds in your soil. The wrong people can plant the wrong seeds and it can harm the quality of your garden in no time. If you aren’t mindful of who you allow into your garden, it can sometimes become unrecognizable in a matter of weeks.

Your deeply rooted beliefs are the thick tree trunks that seem impossible to remove. But it’s worth it to try.

Maybe someone once carved “You aren’t good enough” into the bark of one of the trees and it stares at you constantly, even when you aren’t looking in it’s direction. Remember, excavations are possible. It’ll be hard work, and you’ll work up a sweat trying to uproot it… you’ll likely want to give up out of sheer frustration… but there’s more sunshine when the trees are gone and the decaying leaves aren’t blocking all of the sunlight.

Be ruthless in pulling out the weeds from your garden. Remove whole plants regularly. It’s all up for questioning. Every single part of it. Nothing is sacred in your garden, other than what you deem to be.

Maybe you used to love roses, but now you’re kind of over roses and you want something a bit more unique. That’s fine. You’re allowed to change your mind.

Remember that no matter how beautiful and brilliant and awe-inspiring a certain floral display is, it will change. Usually much sooner than you want it to.

It will constantly be changing. The trick is to let go of the expectation that it will stay the same one day after the next, and loving it wholly when you stumble upon it’s marvellous, momentary beauty.

Above all else, remember that it’s your garden.

You get to do exactly what you want with it.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
5 Changes To Make In Your Environment To Improve Your Life
Aug 21, 2013
Jordan Gray
5 Changes To Make In Your Environment To Improve Your Life
Is your environment bringing you down? Your environment has a huge impact on your health, happiness, and your relationships. The physical clutter around you… the people you choose to spend most of your time with… the sounds that fill your ears… they all have large-scale measurable effects on you. Our...
Continue Reading
In Praise Of Emotionally Strong Women
Mar 9, 2015
Jordan Gray
In Praise Of Emotionally Strong Women
Here’s to the emotionally strong women... The women that have done their work. The women that know the value of self-love and self-care. The women that hold themselves, and others, to higher standards. The women that have felt grief, and received the grief of their loved ones. The women who turn...
Continue Reading
6 Ways To Meet Someone Without Online Dating
Jan 15, 2024
Jordan Gray
6 Ways To Meet Someone Without Online Dating
I was recently speaking with a client who felt exhausted by online dating. The endless swiping... the sub-par dating pool... the lack of intrigue for anyone that registered as anything more than a (totally generous) 5 out of 10 on the excitement scale. And hey, honestly, I don't blame her. Back...
Continue Reading
7 Incredibly Reasonable Things You’re Allowed To Want In A Partner
Jul 27, 2024
Jordan Gray
7 Incredibly Reasonable Things You’re Allowed To Want In A Partner
When I work with single clients, they often hesitate to fully acknowledge what they want in a partner. In fact, there are a handful of themes that consistently come up as it pertains to things they don't give themselves full permission to want. And without conscious awareness of these themes, people...
Continue Reading
This Is Your Life Purpose
Oct 8, 2017
Jordan Gray
This Is Your Life Purpose
To feel alive... This is your life purpose. Spend time with people who make you feel alive. Eat food that makes you feel alive. Do work that makes you feel alive. Spend your money on experiences that make you feel more alive. Do things that make you feel alive. If the answer is...
Continue Reading
“What If They’re The Best I’ll Ever Do?”
Apr 2, 2016
Jordan Gray
“What If They’re The Best I’ll Ever Do?”
Tears streaming down her face, my client looked at me and asked “What if he’s the best I ever do? What if that was my one shot at true love and everything is ruined for me now?” I felt and understood her pain. It was an empathy that I had felt only a few hours before with another client. Strangely enough,...
Continue Reading