Mar 5, 2016

Your Life Is A Garden

Your life is a garden. And it needs constant attention.

Your garden needs water, sunlight, effort, and love in order to truly thrive.

If you treat your soil well then nutritious foods and beautiful flowers will be able to spring forth, or… you can treat your soil badly and it’ll feel like nothing ever really blooms or flourishes in your world.

Be mindful of who you allow to plant seeds in your soil. The wrong people can plant the wrong seeds and it can harm the quality of your garden in no time. If you aren’t mindful of who you allow into your garden, it can sometimes become unrecognizable in a matter of weeks.

Your deeply rooted beliefs are the thick tree trunks that seem impossible to remove. But it’s worth it to try.

Maybe someone once carved “You aren’t good enough” into the bark of one of the trees and it stares at you constantly, even when you aren’t looking in it’s direction. Remember, excavations are possible. It’ll be hard work, and you’ll work up a sweat trying to uproot it… you’ll likely want to give up out of sheer frustration… but there’s more sunshine when the trees are gone and the decaying leaves aren’t blocking all of the sunlight.

Be ruthless in pulling out the weeds from your garden. Remove whole plants regularly. It’s all up for questioning. Every single part of it. Nothing is sacred in your garden, other than what you deem to be.

Maybe you used to love roses, but now you’re kind of over roses and you want something a bit more unique. That’s fine. You’re allowed to change your mind.

Remember that no matter how beautiful and brilliant and awe-inspiring a certain floral display is, it will change. Usually much sooner than you want it to.

It will constantly be changing. The trick is to let go of the expectation that it will stay the same one day after the next, and loving it wholly when you stumble upon it’s marvellous, momentary beauty.

Above all else, remember that it’s your garden.

You get to do exactly what you want with it.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
How To Get Rid Of Your Repressed Anger
Nov 6, 2016
Jordan Gray
How To Get Rid Of Your Repressed Anger
Left unprocessed, repressed anger will wreak havoc on your happiness, your relationships, and your overall life. "But I'm not an angry person. I never get angry!", say most people everywhere. If you found your way to this article, there's some repressed anger buried somewhere deep inside of you. And...
Continue Reading
You Are Allowed To Want What You Want
Nov 12, 2016
Jordan Gray
You Are Allowed To Want What You Want
Repeat after me… “I am allowed to want what I want.” Say it out loud. Don’t worry… I’ll wait. “I am allowed to want what I want.” Done? How did that feel? If you’re like most people, there’s probably a combination of a little bit of fear/nervousness, mixed in with a deep sense of peace and calm. It...
Continue Reading
9 Reasons To Not Use Dating Apps (At All, Ever)
Jan 29, 2025
Jordan Gray
9 Reasons To Not Use Dating Apps (At All, Ever)
Despite millions of people using dating apps, nearly 80% of users report feeling burnt out, frustrated, and no closer to finding a meaningful connection. While dating apps claim to bring people together, some research suggests they often do the opposite - leading to higher rates of anxiety, lower...
Continue Reading
8 Reasons You Won’t Attract A Conscious Man (As You Currently Are)
Mar 1, 2024
Jordan Gray
8 Reasons You Won’t Attract A Conscious Man (As You Currently Are)
Think you're ready for a relationship with a conscious man? The truth might surprise you. If you have been single for years, and yet you have the desire to be in a committed relationship with a man who meets you on all levels, there could be some unconscious blocks that are keeping you from attracting...
Continue Reading
Why I Say No To Almost Everything (And You Should Too)
Sep 22, 2015
Jordan Gray
Why I Say No To Almost Everything (And You Should Too)
Saying no to things you don’t want to do is liberating. In the past twelve hours I have been asked about fifteen questions like the following in my Facebook inbox... “Hey, I know you usually take the weekends off from hanging out with people… but can you help me move on Saturday?” “Hey! I’m building...
Continue Reading
10 Daily Habits That Have Been Changing My Life Lately
Mar 4, 2018
Jordan Gray
10 Daily Habits That Have Been Changing My Life Lately
I go in and out of cycles of being overly interested in hacking and optimizing my life’s habits. I’ll have a couple of months where I’m really focused on optimizing my physical health (i.e. seeing a personal trainer every week, taking vacations, soaking up lots of time in nature, eating my weight in...
Continue Reading