Mar 5, 2016

Your Life Is A Garden

Your life is a garden. And it needs constant attention.

Your garden needs water, sunlight, effort, and love in order to truly thrive.

If you treat your soil well then nutritious foods and beautiful flowers will be able to spring forth, or… you can treat your soil badly and it’ll feel like nothing ever really blooms or flourishes in your world.

Be mindful of who you allow to plant seeds in your soil. The wrong people can plant the wrong seeds and it can harm the quality of your garden in no time. If you aren’t mindful of who you allow into your garden, it can sometimes become unrecognizable in a matter of weeks.

Your deeply rooted beliefs are the thick tree trunks that seem impossible to remove. But it’s worth it to try.

Maybe someone once carved “You aren’t good enough” into the bark of one of the trees and it stares at you constantly, even when you aren’t looking in it’s direction. Remember, excavations are possible. It’ll be hard work, and you’ll work up a sweat trying to uproot it… you’ll likely want to give up out of sheer frustration… but there’s more sunshine when the trees are gone and the decaying leaves aren’t blocking all of the sunlight.

Be ruthless in pulling out the weeds from your garden. Remove whole plants regularly. It’s all up for questioning. Every single part of it. Nothing is sacred in your garden, other than what you deem to be.

Maybe you used to love roses, but now you’re kind of over roses and you want something a bit more unique. That’s fine. You’re allowed to change your mind.

Remember that no matter how beautiful and brilliant and awe-inspiring a certain floral display is, it will change. Usually much sooner than you want it to.

It will constantly be changing. The trick is to let go of the expectation that it will stay the same one day after the next, and loving it wholly when you stumble upon it’s marvellous, momentary beauty.

Above all else, remember that it’s your garden.

You get to do exactly what you want with it.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
5 Of The People I Respect The Most In The World
Jan 15, 2017
Jordan Gray
5 Of The People I Respect The Most In The World
I have had a lot of mentors throughout my lifetime. Some of them I have done work with in real life, others I have only learned from at a distance (whether because of their limited availability, or because they are no longer alive). One of the greatest life hacks available to us is to surround ourselves...
Continue Reading
How To Handle The Pain Of Sexual Rejection From Your Partner
Nov 28, 2020
Jordan Gray
How To Handle The Pain Of Sexual Rejection From Your Partner
Ever been sexually rejected by your partner? If you've ever been in a relationship that's lasted longer than six months, the answer would be yes. I recently got this email from a reader, and I decided to answer it in a long-form article, as I know that others would benefit from it. Here's the letter,...
Continue Reading
How To Date Someone Even If You Are Married
Jan 15, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Date Someone Even If You Are Married
The courting phase of your relationship shouldn't end just because you tied the knot. If you actively date your partner (the one that you are already with, of course), you will appreciate them that much more and your relationship will thrive. You know that investing in your relationship is important,...
Continue Reading
7 Ways To Get Your Physical Touch Needs Met When You’re Single
Dec 31, 2018
Jordan Gray
7 Ways To Get Your Physical Touch Needs Met When You’re Single
Yesterday, a close friend of mine asked me for ideas on how to get their physical touch needs met outside of a relationship (as they are currently single) and I realized I had a lot more to say on the matter than I would have assumed. So, in this article, I am going to dive into seven ways that...
Continue Reading
How To Know If A Woman Is Attracted To You Or Your Lifestyle
Mar 17, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Know If A Woman Is Attracted To You Or Your Lifestyle
Tell me if this sounds familiar… I recently went on a date. And less than ten minutes into the date the woman sitting across from me asked me what I did for a living (a completely reasonable question). When I told her that I am a self-employed relationship coach and had written four books, she...
Continue Reading
How To Make A Full Time Income From Blogging (A Complete Guide)
Feb 12, 2017
Jordan Gray
How To Make A Full Time Income From Blogging (A Complete Guide)
Do you want to write for a living? Do you want to own your own business? Do you want to make more money, working fewer hours, while never having to go to an office, ever again? Well, guess what... not only is it totally doable, it’s never been more doable at any other point in the history of humanity. The...
Continue Reading