May 21, 2016

Forget The Noise - Here’s Who You Really Are

Your weight. Your height. Your eye colour.

Your income. Your job title. The car you drive.

Your wrinkles. Your fat. Your cellulite. Your bra size. Your penis length. Your hairline. Anything and everything that you obsess about when you look in the mirror.

It’s all noise.

All of those things don’t mean a whole lot to anyone who really matters in your life.

No matter your bank balance… or who you are in the world… or what you look like…

You are you because of your heart.

You are you because of your unique essence.

You are you because of the specific ways that you show up in the world that don’t match up to anyone else’s way of being.

You are loveable and valuable, simply because you exist.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you lose your hair and gain weight.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you lose your important sounding job.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you make a mistake that feels out of integrity sometimes.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you try making a run at your dream job and it takes longer than you think it should be taking.

You will be loveable and valuable even if all you do today is smile at a stranger while you walk past them. You’ll also be loveable and valuable if you’re in such an awful mood that you can barely look up at anyone to make eye contact.

For the love of all that is good with the world, please don’t buy into the societally-reinforced noise that tells you that you need to be slimmer, stronger, sexier, richer, or better dressed in order to be loveable, worthwhile, or valuable as a human being.

You are loveable as you currently are, and that will never change.

You. Are. Loved.

And you will be loved, and deserving of love, at every stage of your journey.

I promise.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
Why People Don't Get The Life They Say They Want (5 Reasons)
Aug 19, 2024
Jordan Gray
Why People Don’t Get The Life They Say They Want (5 Reasons)
Few things are more tender, or more meaningful, to us than our heart's deepest dreams. In fact, the tenderness of our desires is so real that we often find sneaky, subtle ways to side-step them completely. Have you ever known someone who said, for years, that they wanted something more than anything? And...
Continue Reading
5 Mistakes I Made On The Path To Finding My Wife
Jul 15, 2025
Jordan Gray
5 Mistakes I Made On The Path To Finding My Wife
Before meeting my wife, I spent years getting in my own way. I made a handful of mistakes that likely cost me years of connection, intimacy, and peace of mind. I remember sitting across from a friend one night, telling him that maybe I just wasn’t cut out for lasting love. I was frustrated,...
Continue Reading
3 Questions to Ask Yourself on Your Deathbed
May 4, 2013
Jordan Gray
3 Questions to Ask Yourself on Your Deathbed
I'm lying near the peak of a mountain in Lombok, Indonesia. My legs, arms, and chest muscles have been shaking violently for the past twenty minutes. I have lost all feeling in my hands and chest. I'm having trouble breathing. And my vision becomes increasingly distorted by the second. "Are you still...
Continue Reading
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Mar 4, 2018
Jordan Gray
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Have you ever heard of the King, Warrior, Magician, and Lover archetypes? These four Jungian archetypes represent the four major components of what makes up any healthy, fully individuated mature masculine essence. In other words, to slide the fader further down the continuum from boy to man, these...
Continue Reading
Why Spiritual Awakening Is So Painful
Jan 7, 2024
Jordan Gray
Why Spiritual Awakening Is So Painful
In order to travel from a state of numbness to a state of joy and dynamic aliveness, you must first feel your way through all of the pain that you buried within. When I truly started to engage in my deeper inner work, I cried daily for a period of 8 months. There were days (maybe weeks?) where I felt...
Continue Reading
This Is The Point Of Life
Jan 21, 2017
Jordan Gray
This Is The Point Of Life
We take life so seriously. We’re running from one milestone to the next… thinking that all we are is the sum total of our accomplishments. “Forget human being… I’m a human doing!”, cries the collective wounded unconscious. But we forgot something that our inner child still remembers... The point...
Continue Reading