May 21, 2016

Forget The Noise - Here’s Who You Really Are

Your weight. Your height. Your eye colour.

Your income. Your job title. The car you drive.

Your wrinkles. Your fat. Your cellulite. Your bra size. Your penis length. Your hairline. Anything and everything that you obsess about when you look in the mirror.

It’s all noise.

All of those things don’t mean a whole lot to anyone who really matters in your life.

No matter your bank balance… or who you are in the world… or what you look like…

You are you because of your heart.

You are you because of your unique essence.

You are you because of the specific ways that you show up in the world that don’t match up to anyone else’s way of being.

You are loveable and valuable, simply because you exist.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you lose your hair and gain weight.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you lose your important sounding job.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you make a mistake that feels out of integrity sometimes.

You will be loveable and valuable even if you try making a run at your dream job and it takes longer than you think it should be taking.

You will be loveable and valuable even if all you do today is smile at a stranger while you walk past them. You’ll also be loveable and valuable if you’re in such an awful mood that you can barely look up at anyone to make eye contact.

For the love of all that is good with the world, please don’t buy into the societally-reinforced noise that tells you that you need to be slimmer, stronger, sexier, richer, or better dressed in order to be loveable, worthwhile, or valuable as a human being.

You are loveable as you currently are, and that will never change.

You. Are. Loved.

And you will be loved, and deserving of love, at every stage of your journey.

I promise.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
Should You Date A Driven Woman?
Apr 30, 2014
Jordan Gray
Should You Date A Driven Woman?
Should you date a driven woman, or someone who is more relaxed than you? As someone who already lives their life full throttle, it can be confusing as to whether you should be with someone who can keep up with your levelled up lifestyle, or if you need someone to counteract your high-achieving ways. There...
Continue Reading
You Are Going To Die (So Here's How To Actually Live)
Dec 22, 2017
Jordan Gray
You Are Going To Die (So Here’s How To Actually Live)
I had my first heart attack at the age of 25. I was walking down the street, my arms went numb, my head started spinning, and my heart was pounding faster than it ever had in my life. I walked up to an off-duty ambulance paramedic and said, “I think I’m having a heart attack. I’m definitely...
Continue Reading
5 Sweet Romantic Gestures For Every Day Life
Jul 15, 2015
Jordan Gray
5 Sweet Romantic Gestures For Every Day Life
I recently wrote about grand, sweeping, powerful romantic gestures… and those are fine and dandy… but what about the every day, run-of-the-mill, soft and loving gestures? Maybe you’re not one to really put yourself out there. Maybe your partner embarrasses easily and doesn’t like to have too much attention...
Continue Reading
101 Things I Love About My Wife
Nov 27, 2022
Jordan Gray
101 Things I Love About My Wife
Today is my wife's 30th birthday. Happy birthday Demetra! And so, to celebrate, aside from the usual presents and cards and cuddles (which she is also getting), I decided to write down some things that I love about her. If you've been following her work for any length of time, many of these...
Continue Reading
What To Do When She Is Mad At You
Nov 5, 2013
Jordan Gray
What To Do When She Is Mad At You
Her arms are crossed. She’s stopped communicating with you entirely. She's reluctant to make eye contact with you… and when she does look your way, her gaze is hollow and icy. You rack your brain for what you could have done… What did you say? Did your flirty banter with that waitress over lunch go...
Continue Reading
My Top 5 Best Articles of 2017
Dec 12, 2017
Jordan Gray
My Top 5 Best Articles of 2017
2017 was a huge year of transformation for me. Instead of being the always-working, uber-productive lone wolf that I often fell into being in my first few years of starting this blog, I chose instead to invest heavily in my social life and in cultivating a sense of community... I also started...
Continue Reading