Jan 29, 2014

An Open Love Letter To Women's Bodies

Losing my virginity took less than a minute.

I was so mesmerized by the beauty, openness, and curves of my girlfriend that I felt overwhelmed.

Every curve of her body begging to have my hands on them.

Every patch of skin that I touched softer than the last.

Her eyes staring into my soul with such depth.

Before physically being with a woman I had imagined that sexual intimacy would do something to me… but I had no idea the level of infatuation it would set off in my mind.

This is an open love letter to women’s bodies (with some always-requested action-steps at the end for the guys).

WomanLayingInGrass

So, What’s Your Type?

Through fifteen years of serial-monogamy I have discovered something about my type; my type is no type. Or all types, depending on your perspective.

The older I get the wider of a variety of women I find myself being attracted to.

Throughout my life I have adored short, curvy women whose mere existence just begs to be picked up and swung around.

I appreciate tall, slender women whose little rib cages call out for my arms to wrap around them.

I find myself marvelling at the folds, flab, bones, curves, and angles of women.

Beautiful curvaceous women with figures like chandeliers.

Long, slender women with bodies like bullets straight through my heart.

Women with elegant necks, chewable collar bones, and hairlines that smell like everything that is right with the world.

It would be all too easy to say that your type is a 5’9 blonde with this and that feature… but if you are unable see the inherent beauty in all women’s bodies, you will forever struggle to see it truthfully in your woman’s body.

Part view of a man's hands caressing a nude woman's back.

When Did Bodies Become Something We Have To Apologize For?

When I hear (mostly) women talking about how fat, weak, bloated, hairy, or oily their bodies are my heart springs into action.

Like a toddler who resists admitting that his unique piece of art really is that amazing, I lavish praise on the body-shame.

Her: “Does my butt look big in this jeans?”

Me: “Mmm totally! It looks fucking fantastic.”

All emotional resistance can be melted through with love and acceptance.

Not only does praise melt away body-shame in the moment, but it can also prevent it by constantly reassuring the owner of said body.

In my relationship, my partner doesn’t go a day without hearing about something that I love about her body (among other things).

If you are with someone, it’s because you want to be with them. Don’t just tell yourself “She knows that I’m attracted to her”… TELL her.

Contextual masculine brain thinking goes like this… “If I tell her that I love her or that I am attracted to her body, that statement is still true unless otherwise modified.”

While present-minded feminine thinking says “I logically know that he says he’s attracted to me… but how does he feel about me now? Today? This very moment?”

Loving couple lying in bed

For The Action-Takers Out There

For the men who are craving the usual action steps that occur in my articles…

If you are currently in a relationship, remind yourself what you love about your partners appearance.

When was the last time that you told her that her thighs absolutely kill you?

When was the last time you came up behind her and wrapped your arms around her beautiful torso and growled softly in her ear?

How long has it been since she saw the look of awe and disbelief in your eyes as you scanned her delicious body from head to toe?

Your woman craves praise and appreciation.

The feminine in every person (male or female) is nourished by praise.

So tell your partner what you like and tell them often.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Ps. Do you want to honour your woman’s bod by being the best lover possible? Check out Supercharge Your Sex Life. In a matter of days you could be lasting longer, pleasing your partner more fully, and having the best sex of your entire life.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
3 Unique Tricks To Make You The Best Partner Possible
May 21, 2014
Jordan Gray
3 Unique Tricks To Make You The Best Partner Possible
If you found your way to this article that means that you are automatically a phenomenal person. Seriously. What kind of person takes time out of their day to try and become an even better boyfriend/husband/partner to their significant other? An awesome person, that's who. By following one or...
Continue Reading
The 6 Best Herbs And Supplements For Boosting Sex Drive
Feb 6, 2017
Jordan Gray
The 6 Best Herbs And Supplements For Boosting Sex Drive
Your sex drive is a good overall indicator of how healthy you are. If you are a male and you aren’t waking up with regular erections (especially if you're a male under 50 years old), then that can be an issue. The happier your body is the more sexual desire it will have. Remember... “Horny...
Continue Reading
I Had Sex With Over 300 Women, And Then Got Married
Jul 30, 2023
Jordan Gray
I Had Sex With Over 300 Women, And Then Got Married
Between the ages of 16-30, I had well over 300 sexual partners. At a certain point, I stopped counting... but my best guess would be somewhere between 330-380. When I've told select friends this, they are often amazed. How does someone even rack up those kinds of numbers? In reality, I was absolutely...
Continue Reading
How I Learned To Have Male Friends
Dec 11, 2019
Jordan Gray
How I Learned To Have Male Friends
I was bullied by my siblings for years in my childhood, and my brother was the ringleader of it all. It felt horrible. Like I was unworthy of love. I hated it so much that I tried to kill myself when I was 15 years old. As a result, I built a story in my mind that other men weren't trustable. For years...
Continue Reading
7 Bedtime Routines For Greater Intimacy
Oct 13, 2015
Jordan Gray
7 Bedtime Routines For Greater Intimacy
Whenever a couple comes to me looking to be proactive about their relationship (aka they're doing just fine, but they want to make some small improvements), I always ask them about what their night time routines look like. Inevitably, the usual suspects are mentioned... They brush their teeth,...
Continue Reading
7 Things You Can Do Right Now To Be Better In Bed
Aug 26, 2014
Jordan Gray
7 Things You Can Do Right Now To Be Better In Bed
Let’s face it… our current sexual education system is completely broken. Between rom-coms, pornography, and the half-assed ‘talk’ we get from our well-meaning parents, the sexual information we learn throughout our formative years leaves much to the imagination. The effect? Generations of unaware...
Continue Reading