Mar 2, 2013

Take The Leap

Take The Leap

I am three hours away from leaving my hometown on a one-way ticket to Asia. My small carry-on, sitting in the corner of my bedroom, has been packed for weeks. I told my girlfriend that I had packed it because I was so excited to leave, but if I’m being honest with myself, a large part of why I packed early was because I was afraid of leaving and I had hoped that the packed bag would convince me that I wasn’t.

My cell phone has been disabled and put into storage, I’ve attended all of the going-away parties, and there’s nothing left to do but get on the plane.

Thoughts race through my mind at a rapid pace. What if I hate it there? What if this is the last thing I need right now? What if I’m homesick the entire time?

I take a deep breath, the wind in my lungs dissipating my worries.

Fuck it. Take the leap.

TakingLeap

What call are you afraid of making in your life?

Is it time that you ended a relationship with an old friend? Do you need to leave your partner because you know she isn’t the one for you? Do you hate your job?

You have a few decades left to live… are you going to spend them being miserable? Maybe miserable is too strong of a word, but your life is calling for some drastic action right now.

At a certain point, after you analyze, prepare, and decide what you need to do, you just need to take the leap.

The decision is obvious, but the reality is terrifying.

We all experience that. As men, we are often afraid to admit uncertainty or weakness in any form. I experience nervousness, fear, and uncertainty just as much as any other guy (maybe even more because I am so relentless with myself about becoming self-actualized). There is nothing more normal than fear. There is a quote that I love that goes, “The more personal, the more universal”. It’s basically saying that every little thing that you think that no one should ever find out about you (because it is SO embarrassing) is a sure sign that everyone experiences that same feeling. And probably on a frequent basis.

What is not normal, is having your life be run by fear. Some fear is healthy, an over-abundance of fear is damaging and limits your entire life in every way.

See that girl you’re attracted to? Go talk to her. You don’t know what to say? Start with “Hi”. Then go from there.

You know the job that you feel stuck in and you dislike so much? You can leave it. You can find another job. That other job might have to pay less for a while, but guess what, you’ll be happy again.

Do you feel like a lot of your friends don’t really have your best interests at heart? Stop hanging out with them. The great thing about living in a world with seven billion people is that you can choose to make new friends. Sounds good right? Try it out!

So what call are you not making in your life?

As scary as it may seem, you will probably grow from it… just as I am about to grow by moving to Asia for a while.

Is it scary?  Absolutely.

Is it worth it?  Always.

Take the leap.

(Ps. As I write these words I am now two months in to my travels and have already grown so much as a person (and wrote three books). I took the leap and it was worth it. Like it always is. I’ll be posting a video of my travels soon)

(Update: Here is the video that I alluded to… my first month traveling/scuba diving/rock climbing through Asia – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4n58ZgCy76g )

Me, taking a leap in Thailand

Me, taking a leap in Thailand

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
How To Start And Run A Men's Group Successfully
Oct 6, 2018
Jordan Gray
How To Start And Run A Men’s Group Successfully
Ever thought of joining (or being in) a weekly men's group? Do you hear the concept of men's groups popping up more and more in the cultural lexicon and you're curious as to what they're all about? Over the last four years I have been a member of a weekly men's group. I have mentioned this in...
Continue Reading
11 Thoughtful Things I Do For My Wife
Mar 27, 2024
Jordan Gray
11 Thoughtful Things I Do For My Wife
When it comes to sustaining a thriving, healthy marriage, I believe that grand gestures are overrated. In a world of choreographed, flash-mob proposals and Pinterest-perfect breakfasts-in-bed, it's easy to get caught up in the grand gestures of love, but I think it's the little things that truly keep...
Continue Reading
4 Honest As Fuck Questions You Need To Ask Yourself Often
Apr 13, 2016
Jordan Gray
4 Honest As Fuck Questions You Need To Ask Yourself Often
Every day in my journal for the past few months I have been answering a series of questions that forces me to get uncomfortably honest with myself. Between the completion of a significant romantic relationship, losing a close friend unexpectedly, and many other life changes, I have been having a challenging...
Continue Reading
10 Questions To Ask To Go Deep In Your Relationship
Aug 19, 2014
Jordan Gray
10 Questions To Ask To Go Deep In Your Relationship
Let’s face it... we all love taking short cuts. And, if we aren't careful, our relationships are often taken for granted. But too many short cuts can lead to a lazy, unintentional relationship that merely exists, instead of thrives. If you want to shed years of emotional baggage, feel loved and...
Continue Reading
One Tip That’s Guaranteed To Improve Your Relationship
Oct 14, 2014
Jordan Gray
One Tip That’s Guaranteed To Improve Your Relationship
A tip that’s guaranteed to improve your relationship, hmm? A bold claim? Not in the slightest. This is absolute fact and it’s something that I’ve been recommending to my clients for years. But first, a quick story. The Money Hungry Entrepreneur With A Suffering Home Life I once had a client...
Continue Reading
How To Make Friends As An Adult (7 Steps)
Aug 6, 2017
Jordan Gray
How To Make Friends As An Adult (7 Steps)
Hello friend, Let me start with a personal story... When I started this website (back in 2013), I made a conscious decision to de-prioritize the majority of my friendships and focus primarily on creating value for my readers. I would go months without seeing certain friends. When I did socialize...
Continue Reading