Nov 5, 2014

The Battle Between Your Work And Your Woman

“A man’s life is a constant battle between his work and his woman.”

I get asked the question “How do you find the balance between your work and your girlfriend/wife/partner?” on a weekly basis.

Lets dig into what’s really going on when a client asks me this.

They’re feeling overwhelmed. They’re feeling stressed. They feel stretched too thin.

They love their work/career/business enough that it genuinely compels them to become the best in the world at what they do.

They also love their partner so deeply that they want to do right by her and make sure that she feels as loved as possible with the limited time resources they might be giving to her.

In my mind, there are two strategies that you can choose.

Prioritizing Business Advancement Above Your Relationship

Knowing that most men derive a huge amount of self-esteem and identity level happiness from their work, it’s no wonder that they would naturally gravitate towards prioritizing their work over their woman.

When I ask my clients to send me a screen grab of their weekly calendars, it is immediately clear that their work takes the front seat in their lives.

When you prioritize your happiness at any cost (whether through doing work you love, exercising, or engaging in your favourite hobbies) then you are ultimately a happier person. And if you’re happy, then you can be a happy and fulfilled person for your intimate partner.

But there is a limit to how far you can improve your relationship by working extra hard on your career/business.

Prioritizing Your Relationship Over Business Advancement

I believe that working really hard on your career/business doesn’t really funnel excess energy into your relationship, whereas funnelling extra attention and intentionality into your relationship does serve your business.

So you can either work your butt off every day and have that make you a 10% more effective relationship partner, or you can prioritize your love life and have that make you a 300% more effective business man.

Without fail, every time that I have had a client engage in a month long test of making their romantic partner their priority over their business their business has levelled up faster than almost any other growth curve in their businesses history.

Why? Because our emotional energy touches everything that we do. If we aren’t feeling safe, secure, and settled in our love life then it affects us every day that we’re trying to get work done in the office.

Why else? Because you feel that much more confident when you know your partner is well-fucked and blissfully happy with you.

Why else? Because when you remember how much you love spending time with your partner you’ll work smarter within your business, you’ll get more done in less time, and the pillow talk that you engage in with your partner will give you much needed insights and intuition into the work that you’re doing that you might not have otherwise been able to tap into.

Bottom line… setting the energetic foundation of making your relationship and sex life thrive will do so much more for your growth (and the growth of your business) than burning the candle at both ends in your business will do for your home life.

Make her a priority.

Even if you have limited time in your day/week/calendar it’s imperative that you make her feel loved, seen, and appreciated.

Be romantic. Make her feel beautiful. Be the best partner possible.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
How To Find Your Purpose In Life
Feb 20, 2013
Jordan Gray
How To Find Your Purpose In Life
How To Find Your Purpose This past year was by far the most challenging one of my life. I had a quarter-life crisis, gave away basically everything that I owned, and re-connected with who I was as a person.  Through this process I dug into a TON of self-discovery material.  I went...
Continue Reading
“What If They’re The Best I’ll Ever Do?”
Apr 2, 2016
Jordan Gray
“What If They’re The Best I’ll Ever Do?”
Tears streaming down her face, my client looked at me and asked “What if he’s the best I ever do? What if that was my one shot at true love and everything is ruined for me now?” I felt and understood her pain. It was an empathy that I had felt only a few hours before with another client. Strangely enough,...
Continue Reading
7 Relationship Tools For Married Entrepreneurs
Feb 12, 2025
Jordan Gray
7 Relationship Tools For Married Entrepreneurs
You love your spouse. You also love your work. But some days, it feels like you’re being pulled in opposite directions. Between marketing, meetings, and (often self-imposed) deadlines, where does your marriage fit in? The good news is, balancing love and entrepreneurship isn’t about choosing...
Continue Reading
4 Powerful Ways To Melt Their Heart
Jul 26, 2015
Jordan Gray
4 Powerful Ways To Melt Their Heart
Want to give your relationship an incredible boost? Want to melt their heart in a powerful way? You already know how to order flowers, get a gift card to the spa, go out to a fancy dinner, or do any of the other hundreds of suggestions a search engine could offer that would please your partner. What...
Continue Reading
5 Innovative Ways To Get Over Your Ex
Jul 3, 2013
Jordan Gray
5 Innovative Ways To Get Over Your Ex
Breaking up sucks. It's hard to get over someone that you were so close with. Your brain was chemically addicted to them, and now your drug of choice is gone. Whether it's been a couple of days, weeks, or years, you still feel some old emotional residue around that certain someone. With a couple...
Continue Reading
How To Start And Run A Men's Group Successfully
Oct 6, 2018
Jordan Gray
How To Start And Run A Men’s Group Successfully
Ever thought of joining (or being in) a weekly men's group? Do you hear the concept of men's groups popping up more and more in the cultural lexicon and you're curious as to what they're all about? Over the last four years I have been a member of a weekly men's group. I have mentioned this in...
Continue Reading