May 4, 2013

3 Questions to Ask Yourself on Your Deathbed

I’m lying near the peak of a mountain in Lombok, Indonesia. My legs, arms, and chest muscles have been shaking violently for the past twenty minutes. I have lost all feeling in my hands and chest. I’m having trouble breathing. And my vision becomes increasingly distorted by the second.

“Are you still okay Jordan? You look pretty cold”, a concerned backpacker asks me.

“No, I’m fine. Just a bit dizzy”. This should be red flag number two but my fellow traveler believes me.

The temperature continues to drop at the same rate as my level of consciousness. For the first time in my life, I feel like I am at the mercy of a force of nature that could easily take my life.

Without warning, my breathing starts to rapidly constrict and I can no longer see anything. With the last few breaths I can muster at the heightened elevation, I say, “Take me down. Now. I can’t breathe.”

It was terrifying. I had never felt that vulnerable in my life.

After that I don’t remember much. I don’t remember who carried me down to a lower elevation. I don’t remember how I woke up with random people’s clothing on me. And apparently I also didn’t remember that I had asthma as a child and that high elevations could be hazardous to my health (go figure).

What I do remember are my thoughts leading up to my loss of consciousness (I’ll get to those in a moment).

But for now, here are three things you can take away from my near death experience.

Imagine you are facing the end of your life…

Who should you have been more honest to?

Is there someone in your life that deserves to know how you feel about them? Is there someone you need to apologize to? Speak your truth. And soon.

What was left on your bucket list?

Is there an instrument you’ve always wanted to pick up? A continent you wanted to go to? A book you wanted to write? Today is just as good as any to start crossing off your bucket-list items.

What will be your proudest accomplishments?

How did you make other peoples’ lives better? Do you wish you could have done more? Start setting goals in line with your greatest strengths and start taking action!

The moment when I believed that I was going to leave this beautiful planet, I realized how much unfinished business I have.

I’ve yet to say sorry to the person I most want to apologize to.

I’ve yet to meet my wife whose life I am going to change for the better.

I’ve yet to rock a 10,000+ person live event helping men and women become more comfortable with themselves and each other.

So…

What will you be thinking about as you start hurtling towards life’s finish line?

To living a full life,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

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