Dec 3, 2015

The 5 Best Things To Do When You're Hurting

We all hurt sometimes.

Maybe you went through a painful breakup recently. Or you lost someone close to you. Or you’re just in a funk lately and feel like busting out of it (even if only for a couple of hours).

These are my five go-to activities whenever I want to feel better. They’re simple, and they work (for baaaaaasically 100% of people).

Whatever you’re going through, I trust that these will make your days a little bit lighter.

1. Sweat

This one is often the most accessible of the list.

Whether you have a gym pass or not, you can do squats, push ups, or any body weight exercise wherever you are to get your heart rate up.

As we’ve all been told a million times by a million different sources, doing something that makes us sweat a few times per week is super-duper great for our brains, mood, circulatory health and a whole host of other benefits.

If you feel stagnant, get moving.

And if that seems like too much to ask right now, then move on to the next steps.

2. Cry

If you feel like staying in (or being out in public) and sobbing your face off, go for it.

The stress hormones released through either sweating or crying are some of the most efficient ways to feel better for a little while. Plus, crying feels great.

Pull up your favourite sad song, sad movie scene, or old photographs that make you tear up and sit with them until you drip fluids from your eyeballs to your jawline. Et voila! You’re a little bit less stressed now.

3. Laugh

I’ve heard some play specialists (yup, it’s a job) hypothesize that laughter is your body shaking out stress. Kind of like with orgasms, whatever the reason is that it works… I don’t care. But it works.

Watch YouTube clips of your favourite comedians, go see a live comedy night/improv show/movie, or call up one of your friends that you have the most laughs with and jiggle that stress out of your body.

4. Be in water

There’s something universally calming about water. Being in it, being near it, hearing it moving… it’s all relaxing.

I don’t even like being in the ocean. It stresses me out to think of all of the animals that live in it that all want to eat my legs… but I still like sitting on a beach and sipping drinks.

If you don’t have a breezy tropical vacation in your back yard, just take an extended bath or shower. Or go into a sensory deprivation tank (aka float tank) if your city has those nearby.

5. Talk to someone

Sometimes the easiest way to get out of our crappy mood is to have a conversation with someone who we love, trust, and feel safe with.

Often we get wrapped up in our own bad moods because we have too much time to analyze ourselves or focus on the self-perceived negatives in our lives, and when we reach out and chat with a friend, it reminds us that there’s a big, sexy world outside of our’s. And it’s just a phone call/stroll through the park/text message away!

Keep These Five Things Front Of Mind

If these five things resonated with you, make sure that you bookmark this post so that you can keep checking back to it on your down days. Keeping our self-care front of mind is one of the most self-loving things that we can do for ourselves.

And hey, if you want someone to talk to, I’m always here to listen.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
What Our Emotions Are Trying To Tell Us
May 31, 2015
Jordan Gray
What Our Emotions Are Trying To Tell Us
I feel like I would have benefitted a lot from being given a basic lesson in what the core emotions are, how they feel, and what they meant when I was a little boy. Alas, our emotional education is essentially non-existent. There have been times where my body, mind, and heart have been telling...
Continue Reading
In Praise Of Emotionally Strong Women
Mar 9, 2015
Jordan Gray
In Praise Of Emotionally Strong Women
Here’s to the emotionally strong women... The women that have done their work. The women that know the value of self-love and self-care. The women that hold themselves, and others, to higher standards. The women that have felt grief, and received the grief of their loved ones. The women who turn...
Continue Reading
Clearing: The Single Greatest Connection Exercise For Couples
Dec 25, 2016
Jordan Gray
Clearing: The Single Greatest Connection Exercise For Couples
Have you ever heard of clearing exercises? They are the single greatest ways for couples to reconnect, work through arguments, and tap into a sense of clarity and ease in their relationship. Throughout the course of a relationship, many unspoken things can accumulate and begin to turn into emotional...
Continue Reading
Unfathomable Pain, Unfathomable Beauty
Mar 18, 2018
Jordan Gray
Unfathomable Pain, Unfathomable Beauty
The world is incomprehensibly vast and dynamic. It would be too easy to throw in the nihilistic towel and say, 'The world is too messed up. My life has no meaning. What's the point of it all?' Because, yes, the amount of pain and suffering in the world is truly unfathomable. Every day, loved...
Continue Reading
10 Ways For Men To Sharpen Their Sword 
Jun 2, 2020
Jordan Gray
10 Ways For Men To Sharpen Their Sword 
If you want to become a more effective and powerful man, it will require methodical training and conquering challenges. Now, if you’ve been reading my other writing on integrating your masculinity and becoming a stronger person, you’ll find that I might often stress the inner work, or, more specifically,...
Continue Reading
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Mar 4, 2018
Jordan Gray
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Have you ever heard of the King, Warrior, Magician, and Lover archetypes? These four Jungian archetypes represent the four major components of what makes up any healthy, fully individuated mature masculine essence. In other words, to slide the fader further down the continuum from boy to man, these...
Continue Reading