Dec 3, 2015

The 5 Best Things To Do When You're Hurting

We all hurt sometimes.

Maybe you went through a painful breakup recently. Or you lost someone close to you. Or you’re just in a funk lately and feel like busting out of it (even if only for a couple of hours).

These are my five go-to activities whenever I want to feel better. They’re simple, and they work (for baaaaaasically 100% of people).

Whatever you’re going through, I trust that these will make your days a little bit lighter.

1. Sweat

This one is often the most accessible of the list.

Whether you have a gym pass or not, you can do squats, push ups, or any body weight exercise wherever you are to get your heart rate up.

As we’ve all been told a million times by a million different sources, doing something that makes us sweat a few times per week is super-duper great for our brains, mood, circulatory health and a whole host of other benefits.

If you feel stagnant, get moving.

And if that seems like too much to ask right now, then move on to the next steps.

2. Cry

If you feel like staying in (or being out in public) and sobbing your face off, go for it.

The stress hormones released through either sweating or crying are some of the most efficient ways to feel better for a little while. Plus, crying feels great.

Pull up your favourite sad song, sad movie scene, or old photographs that make you tear up and sit with them until you drip fluids from your eyeballs to your jawline. Et voila! You’re a little bit less stressed now.

3. Laugh

I’ve heard some play specialists (yup, it’s a job) hypothesize that laughter is your body shaking out stress. Kind of like with orgasms, whatever the reason is that it works… I don’t care. But it works.

Watch YouTube clips of your favourite comedians, go see a live comedy night/improv show/movie, or call up one of your friends that you have the most laughs with and jiggle that stress out of your body.

4. Be in water

There’s something universally calming about water. Being in it, being near it, hearing it moving… it’s all relaxing.

I don’t even like being in the ocean. It stresses me out to think of all of the animals that live in it that all want to eat my legs… but I still like sitting on a beach and sipping drinks.

If you don’t have a breezy tropical vacation in your back yard, just take an extended bath or shower. Or go into a sensory deprivation tank (aka float tank) if your city has those nearby.

5. Talk to someone

Sometimes the easiest way to get out of our crappy mood is to have a conversation with someone who we love, trust, and feel safe with.

Often we get wrapped up in our own bad moods because we have too much time to analyze ourselves or focus on the self-perceived negatives in our lives, and when we reach out and chat with a friend, it reminds us that there’s a big, sexy world outside of our’s. And it’s just a phone call/stroll through the park/text message away!

Keep These Five Things Front Of Mind

If these five things resonated with you, make sure that you bookmark this post so that you can keep checking back to it on your down days. Keeping our self-care front of mind is one of the most self-loving things that we can do for ourselves.

And hey, if you want someone to talk to, I’m always here to listen.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
Your Life Is A Garden
Mar 5, 2016
Jordan Gray
Your Life Is A Garden
Your life is a garden. And it needs constant attention. Your garden needs water, sunlight, effort, and love in order to truly thrive. If you treat your soil well then nutritious foods and beautiful flowers will be able to spring forth, or... you can treat your soil badly and it’ll feel like nothing...
Continue Reading
How Making Mistakes Gets You Ahead In Life
May 9, 2013
Jordan Gray
How Making Mistakes Gets You Ahead In Life
Are you worried that you are messing up a lot in your life? One of the most common concerns that I get from my clients is that they feel like they are failing. They feel like they are failing in life… in their careers… and in their relationships. If you sometimes feel this way, then you are exactly...
Continue Reading
To The Perpetual Fence Sitters
Nov 17, 2018
Jordan Gray
To The Perpetual Fence Sitters
Here are three true short stories. About Tammy, Anna, and Joe.  (All names and any identifying details have been changed to protect identity.) Tammy Last week, a woman (who I will call Tammy) sent me a 1,000+ word email telling me about how she wanted...
Continue Reading
5 Sweet Romantic Gestures For Every Day Life
Jul 15, 2015
Jordan Gray
5 Sweet Romantic Gestures For Every Day Life
I recently wrote about grand, sweeping, powerful romantic gestures… and those are fine and dandy… but what about the every day, run-of-the-mill, soft and loving gestures? Maybe you’re not one to really put yourself out there. Maybe your partner embarrasses easily and doesn’t like to have too much attention...
Continue Reading
How To Stop Dating Below Your Potential
Nov 11, 2013
Jordan Gray
How To Stop Dating Below Your Potential
If you chronically date partners that you feel are "safe" or that are just simply incompatible with you, it can be a frustrating habit to maintain. Maybe you are in a really good place in your life (you're fit, intelligent, personable, and *ahem* modest) and yet you find yourself sliding into relationships...
Continue Reading
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Mar 4, 2018
Jordan Gray
King Warrior Magician Lover: How To Grow The 4 Masculine Archetypes
Have you ever heard of the King, Warrior, Magician, and Lover archetypes? These four Jungian archetypes represent the four major components of what makes up any healthy, fully individuated mature masculine essence. In other words, to slide the fader further down the continuum from boy to man, these...
Continue Reading