Dec 3, 2015

The 5 Best Things To Do When You're Hurting

We all hurt sometimes.

Maybe you went through a painful breakup recently. Or you lost someone close to you. Or you’re just in a funk lately and feel like busting out of it (even if only for a couple of hours).

These are my five go-to activities whenever I want to feel better. They’re simple, and they work (for baaaaaasically 100% of people).

Whatever you’re going through, I trust that these will make your days a little bit lighter.

1. Sweat

This one is often the most accessible of the list.

Whether you have a gym pass or not, you can do squats, push ups, or any body weight exercise wherever you are to get your heart rate up.

As we’ve all been told a million times by a million different sources, doing something that makes us sweat a few times per week is super-duper great for our brains, mood, circulatory health and a whole host of other benefits.

If you feel stagnant, get moving.

And if that seems like too much to ask right now, then move on to the next steps.

2. Cry

If you feel like staying in (or being out in public) and sobbing your face off, go for it.

The stress hormones released through either sweating or crying are some of the most efficient ways to feel better for a little while. Plus, crying feels great.

Pull up your favourite sad song, sad movie scene, or old photographs that make you tear up and sit with them until you drip fluids from your eyeballs to your jawline. Et voila! You’re a little bit less stressed now.

3. Laugh

I’ve heard some play specialists (yup, it’s a job) hypothesize that laughter is your body shaking out stress. Kind of like with orgasms, whatever the reason is that it works… I don’t care. But it works.

Watch YouTube clips of your favourite comedians, go see a live comedy night/improv show/movie, or call up one of your friends that you have the most laughs with and jiggle that stress out of your body.

4. Be in water

There’s something universally calming about water. Being in it, being near it, hearing it moving… it’s all relaxing.

I don’t even like being in the ocean. It stresses me out to think of all of the animals that live in it that all want to eat my legs… but I still like sitting on a beach and sipping drinks.

If you don’t have a breezy tropical vacation in your back yard, just take an extended bath or shower. Or go into a sensory deprivation tank (aka float tank) if your city has those nearby.

5. Talk to someone

Sometimes the easiest way to get out of our crappy mood is to have a conversation with someone who we love, trust, and feel safe with.

Often we get wrapped up in our own bad moods because we have too much time to analyze ourselves or focus on the self-perceived negatives in our lives, and when we reach out and chat with a friend, it reminds us that there’s a big, sexy world outside of our’s. And it’s just a phone call/stroll through the park/text message away!

Keep These Five Things Front Of Mind

If these five things resonated with you, make sure that you bookmark this post so that you can keep checking back to it on your down days. Keeping our self-care front of mind is one of the most self-loving things that we can do for ourselves.

And hey, if you want someone to talk to, I’m always here to listen.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
One Tip That’s Guaranteed To Improve Your Relationship
Oct 14, 2014
Jordan Gray
One Tip That’s Guaranteed To Improve Your Relationship
A tip that’s guaranteed to improve your relationship, hmm? A bold claim? Not in the slightest. This is absolute fact and it’s something that I’ve been recommending to my clients for years. But first, a quick story. The Money Hungry Entrepreneur With A Suffering Home Life I once had a client...
Continue Reading
Get Off The Hamster Wheel Before It Throws You Off
Aug 19, 2017
Jordan Gray
Get Off The Hamster Wheel Before It Throws You Off
I was talking to a new client a few days ago who was at his whit's end... He was exhausted. Burnt out. Tired all the time. His energy levels were shot. His neck and shoulders were always tense. He wasn't digesting with ease. His body was upset with him. He told me that he hadn't felt truly happy...
Continue Reading
9 Practical Ways To Be More Present In Your Life
Aug 11, 2018
Jordan Gray
9 Practical Ways To Be More Present In Your Life
I once worked with a man (who I will call Tom) who lived in San Francisco. Tom would wake up in the morning to his ringing iPhone alarm, roll over, and immediately check his text messages, his Instagram, and then his two email accounts (in that order). The texts were usually from his friends, the...
Continue Reading
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Jun 7, 2020
Jordan Gray
4 Difficult Ways For Men To Build Confidence
Confidence is the deepest core desire of any man. It is the thing we yearn for above all else, whether we know it or not. It’s the drive hidden behind all of our conventional desires. We seek the high-paying job, the romantic partner, the fit body, or the emotional and psychological healing, because...
Continue Reading
Stop Hoping For An Easy Life
Jan 10, 2019
Jordan Gray
Stop Hoping For An Easy Life
Today, more than ever, people are psychologically soft. We have been raised in a time of unprecedented ease, comfort, and convenience. We are, on a daily basis, guarded from the painful realities of life. We avoid real-time romantic rejection by swiping left and right on the faces of strangers. We...
Continue Reading
The 3 Best And Worst Things To Say To Someone With Depression
Oct 1, 2016
Jordan Gray
The 3 Best And Worst Things To Say To Someone With Depression
I was sitting in my men’s group last night when one of the men revealed that he had been suffering with depression and suicidal ideation for the past several weeks. Without prompting, half a dozen of the guys in the room started to rattle off some of the least productive things that you can say to someone...
Continue Reading