Apr 20, 2015

How Experiencing Burnout Made Me A Better Partner

A couple of years ago when I first started building my business, I was working unsustainably crazy hours. I wrote three books in two months, I was writing four new articles per week, and I was hopping around from city to city every few days and dealing with all of the logistics that came along with that.

It was from this period of time that I first learned what experiencing burnout felt like.

For those of you who haven’t experienced it, burnout feels like physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. You feel ineffective, lethargic, and unproductive. It’s as if your body and mind start saying “No” to you because you haven’t been setting appropriate boundaries in your life.

But instead of taking time off from building my business (the logical thing to do), I began to study how to recharge my energetic batteries the most efficiently.

What I discovered would change my work habits, and ultimately my intimate relationship, forever.

What High Performance Athletes Can Teach You About Improving Your Love Life

In my research, I found out that high performance athletes recharge on three unique time cycles to rest and repair the most efficiently.

They rest in nano cycles, micro cycles, and macro cycles. Let me explain.

Resting in nano cycles means taking a break every hour or so (short-term) or several breaks throughout the day.

Resting in micro cycles means taking time off every week to recharge on a deeper level (medium-term).

And resting in macro cycles means recharging on an even deeper level on a quarterly or annual cycle (long-term).

So what does this have to do with making you a more loving intimate partner?

If you take this same approach with reconnecting with your significant other, your relationship will always be prioritized in a way that serves it.

Nano cycles: Set daily reminders in your phone to think of your partner, give them praise, or add value to their lives. When you leave the house, really kiss them goodbye and be present with your love for them for a moment. Before you go to bed at night, make sure that you physically and emotionally connect before you fall asleep.

Micro cycles: On a weekly basis, make sure you’re clearing the air between you two by having intentional conversations about your relationship. Plan sex dates in your calendar so you can build anticipation and connect on a physical/sexual/spiritual level. Decide on a weekly date night and have something in your calendar that you’re both looking forward to doing together.

Macro cycles: Plan trips together to local bed and breakfasts, cabins, or hotels that you’ll be able to stay in for multiple days. Plan trips abroad to places you’ve never been to before. On at least an annual basis, carve out a minimum of a full week where you and your significant other can reconnect and recharge in peace without distractions.

By taking this three-pronged approach to reconnecting with your loved one, you’ll be sure to keep the home fires roaring better than you ever thought possible.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
4 Man-Melting Phrases That Make Him Fall In Love
Feb 17, 2024
Jordan Gray
4 Man-Melting Phrases That Make Him Fall In Love
Words are powerful. With a simple sentence we can bolster, boost, encourage, or strengthen someone…. And with a different choice of words we can shame, crush, undermine, destroy, or decimate.  After releasing my article 5 Types Of Compliments That Melt A Man’s Heart, a few women reached out to me...
Continue Reading
7 Powerful Ways For Men To Revive A Dead Bedroom
Oct 12, 2020
Jordan Gray
7 Powerful Ways For Men To Revive A Dead Bedroom
In a long-term relationship and your sex life has taken a nosedive? You're not alone. Nobody gets proper training in how to sustain connection and sexual desire in a long-term relationship or marriage, so why would we know how to keep the erotic home fires burning after the initial spark wears off? The...
Continue Reading
7 Things You Can Do Right Now To Be Better In Bed
Aug 26, 2014
Jordan Gray
7 Things You Can Do Right Now To Be Better In Bed
Let’s face it… our current sexual education system is completely broken. Between rom-coms, pornography, and the half-assed ‘talk’ we get from our well-meaning parents, the sexual information we learn throughout our formative years leaves much to the imagination. The effect? Generations of unaware...
Continue Reading
7 Things I Want You To Remember If I Die Young
Nov 10, 2018
Jordan Gray
7 Things I Want You To Remember If I Die Young
I’ve lost two close friends over the past few years. One was 25 years old, the other was 30. And, without hyperbole or rose-coloured glasses on my face, I can easily say that they were both some of the best people I have ever known. The kind of people that make me think ‘Only the good die young’...
Continue Reading
Fit As Fuck: 5 Ways To Improve Your Health For Better Sex
Jun 1, 2018
Jordan Gray
Fit As Fuck: 5 Ways To Improve Your Health For Better Sex
Want to be in the best shape ever so that your sex life can flourish? This article will give you the highest leverage hacks you can implement to do just that. Many men worry about appearing too high maintenance when it comes to their self-care... but high maintenance equals high performance. Take care...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate Guide To Giving Him The Best Blowjob Of His Entire Life
Mar 29, 2020
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate Guide To Giving Him The Best Blowjob Of His Entire Life
Want to give him his best blowjob ever? Giving a world-class, life-changing, heart-opening, neighbour-waking blowjob is easier than you might think. With a few simple tricks in their back pocket, anyone can upgrade their fellatio game from mediocre to masterful. You might be reading this to prepare...
Continue Reading