Apr 20, 2015

How Experiencing Burnout Made Me A Better Partner

A couple of years ago when I first started building my business, I was working unsustainably crazy hours. I wrote three books in two months, I was writing four new articles per week, and I was hopping around from city to city every few days and dealing with all of the logistics that came along with that.

It was from this period of time that I first learned what experiencing burnout felt like.

For those of you who haven’t experienced it, burnout feels like physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. You feel ineffective, lethargic, and unproductive. It’s as if your body and mind start saying “No” to you because you haven’t been setting appropriate boundaries in your life.

But instead of taking time off from building my business (the logical thing to do), I began to study how to recharge my energetic batteries the most efficiently.

What I discovered would change my work habits, and ultimately my intimate relationship, forever.

What High Performance Athletes Can Teach You About Improving Your Love Life

In my research, I found out that high performance athletes recharge on three unique time cycles to rest and repair the most efficiently.

They rest in nano cycles, micro cycles, and macro cycles. Let me explain.

Resting in nano cycles means taking a break every hour or so (short-term) or several breaks throughout the day.

Resting in micro cycles means taking time off every week to recharge on a deeper level (medium-term).

And resting in macro cycles means recharging on an even deeper level on a quarterly or annual cycle (long-term).

So what does this have to do with making you a more loving intimate partner?

If you take this same approach with reconnecting with your significant other, your relationship will always be prioritized in a way that serves it.

Nano cycles: Set daily reminders in your phone to think of your partner, give them praise, or add value to their lives. When you leave the house, really kiss them goodbye and be present with your love for them for a moment. Before you go to bed at night, make sure that you physically and emotionally connect before you fall asleep.

Micro cycles: On a weekly basis, make sure you’re clearing the air between you two by having intentional conversations about your relationship. Plan sex dates in your calendar so you can build anticipation and connect on a physical/sexual/spiritual level. Decide on a weekly date night and have something in your calendar that you’re both looking forward to doing together.

Macro cycles: Plan trips together to local bed and breakfasts, cabins, or hotels that you’ll be able to stay in for multiple days. Plan trips abroad to places you’ve never been to before. On at least an annual basis, carve out a minimum of a full week where you and your significant other can reconnect and recharge in peace without distractions.

By taking this three-pronged approach to reconnecting with your loved one, you’ll be sure to keep the home fires roaring better than you ever thought possible.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 18 years, with his work reaching over 250 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading a book, working out with his trainer, or spending time with his wife and son on the East Coast of the United States.

Blog

Related

See All
5 Ways To Stay Attracted To A Partner You've Been With For Years
Jun 9, 2014
Jordan Gray
5 Ways To Stay Attracted To A Partner You’ve Been With For Years
One of the most common questions that I get asked from my clients in relationships is "How do you stay attracted to someone you've been with for years?" I've interviewed couples who have been married from a few months to 50+ years, and they all agree - sexual attraction ebbs and flows in every re...
Continue Reading
Dating Advice For Introverts: The Best Date Ideas To Connect Over
Mar 31, 2013
Jordan Gray
Dating Advice For Introverts: The Best Date Ideas To Connect Over
Dating Advice For Introverts: The Best Date Ideas To Connect Over Dating can be fun, but for a lot of introverts, it can be a tedious task (especially in the early stages of a relationship). These date ideas take place in less stimulating environments that will allow you to connect...
Continue Reading
29 Things I’ve Learned In 29 Years
Apr 21, 2016
Jordan Gray
29 Things I’ve Learned In 29 Years
At the time of my writing this, my 29th birthday is a few days away. 29 laps around the sun... and I feel like I have experienced a fairly densely packed ride so far. I've struggled, I've conquered, I've travelled, I've felt, and I've loved. The following collection of words flowed through me in one...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate Guide To Increasing Sexual Stamina For Men
Dec 13, 2018
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate Guide To Increasing Sexual Stamina For Men
Looking to increase your sexual stamina? Do you want to be able to thrust for hours at full power without worrying about finishing too quickly, and having total control over when you ejaculate? What if I told you that you could even choose IF you wanted to come at all? Sorcery, you say? Continue Reading
7 Exercises To Increase Your Sexual Stamina
Nov 20, 2013
Jordan Gray
7 Exercises To Increase Your Sexual Stamina
Every man wants to be a better lover. For many men, the thought of being unable to provide a lasting and deeply fulfilling sexual experience for his partner is something that causes stress and anxiety. You want to give the kind of sexual performance that has you hoping she’ll brag about it to her friends...
Continue Reading
Why Entrepreneurs Are Bad At Relationships
Mar 27, 2014
Jordan Gray
Why Entrepreneurs Are Bad At Relationships
Easily distracted, unpredictable moods, and eternally busy, entrepreneurs are notorious for being difficult partners. In the context of business, entrepreneurs excel at leading others when they are in a position of authority. But romantic relationships are an entirely different ball game. You don't...
Continue Reading