Apr 20, 2015

How Experiencing Burnout Made Me A Better Partner

A couple of years ago when I first started building my business, I was working unsustainably crazy hours. I wrote three books in two months, I was writing four new articles per week, and I was hopping around from city to city every few days and dealing with all of the logistics that came along with that.

It was from this period of time that I first learned what experiencing burnout felt like.

For those of you who haven’t experienced it, burnout feels like physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. You feel ineffective, lethargic, and unproductive. It’s as if your body and mind start saying “No” to you because you haven’t been setting appropriate boundaries in your life.

But instead of taking time off from building my business (the logical thing to do), I began to study how to recharge my energetic batteries the most efficiently.

What I discovered would change my work habits, and ultimately my intimate relationship, forever.

What High Performance Athletes Can Teach You About Improving Your Love Life

In my research, I found out that high performance athletes recharge on three unique time cycles to rest and repair the most efficiently.

They rest in nano cycles, micro cycles, and macro cycles. Let me explain.

Resting in nano cycles means taking a break every hour or so (short-term) or several breaks throughout the day.

Resting in micro cycles means taking time off every week to recharge on a deeper level (medium-term).

And resting in macro cycles means recharging on an even deeper level on a quarterly or annual cycle (long-term).

So what does this have to do with making you a more loving intimate partner?

If you take this same approach with reconnecting with your significant other, your relationship will always be prioritized in a way that serves it.

Nano cycles: Set daily reminders in your phone to think of your partner, give them praise, or add value to their lives. When you leave the house, really kiss them goodbye and be present with your love for them for a moment. Before you go to bed at night, make sure that you physically and emotionally connect before you fall asleep.

Micro cycles: On a weekly basis, make sure you’re clearing the air between you two by having intentional conversations about your relationship. Plan sex dates in your calendar so you can build anticipation and connect on a physical/sexual/spiritual level. Decide on a weekly date night and have something in your calendar that you’re both looking forward to doing together.

Macro cycles: Plan trips together to local bed and breakfasts, cabins, or hotels that you’ll be able to stay in for multiple days. Plan trips abroad to places you’ve never been to before. On at least an annual basis, carve out a minimum of a full week where you and your significant other can reconnect and recharge in peace without distractions.

By taking this three-pronged approach to reconnecting with your loved one, you’ll be sure to keep the home fires roaring better than you ever thought possible.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
3 Ways That Men And Women Are Conditioned Differently
Apr 24, 2020
Jordan Gray
3 Ways That Men And Women Are Conditioned Differently
No one escapes childhood without passing through a gauntlet of messages about what is expected from them. And while no one gets through unscathed, the messages that men and women receive tend to differ in some fairly consistent ways. Today, I’m going to dig into three of the most common differences. Why?...
Continue Reading
Does Therapy Even Work?
Oct 20, 2018
Jordan Gray
Does Therapy Even Work?
Does therapy actually work or is it just a bunch of hoity-toity bullshit for rich people who want to complain to a stranger about their problems? Myths and stereotypes abound about talk-based therapy. People think that therapists ‘shrink’ heads. Or that therapy clients are simply ‘na...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate Guide To Thigh Jobs (& 11 Sexy Thigh Job Positions)
Jul 22, 2024
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate Guide To Thigh Jobs (& 11 Sexy Thigh Job Positions)
Thigh jobs...? You've heard of handjobs and blowjobs... but thigh jobs? For many people, they are a foreign concept. Also referred to as thighing, thigh sex, and intercrural sex, in a subset of kinksters, explorative couples, and people saving themselves for marriage, thigh jobs are all...
Continue Reading
Being A Healthy, Balanced Adult Is Sexy As Fuck
Dec 10, 2018
Jordan Gray
Being A Healthy, Balanced Adult Is Sexy As Fuck
Self-destruction gets a lot of air time in mainstream media. "Look at this nihilistic badass! He’s constantly shit faced, and smoking a cigarette while he looks off camera left at nothing in particular… because, don't you know, nothing’s worth anything anyways." Nihilism gives...
Continue Reading
3 Tips For A Better Relationship With Your Man
May 31, 2020
Jordan Gray
3 Tips For A Better Relationship With Your Man
Want to inspire your man’s deepest love and commitment? And see just how romantic and emotionally available he can be? Or, if you’re single: Do you want to set yourself up to attract the man of your dreams with total ease? If you do the following three things I’m about to explain, you just might be...
Continue Reading
How To Ease Into Love When Love Terrifies You
Nov 10, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Ease Into Love When Love Terrifies You
“The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That’s guaranteed.” - Bradley Cooper in Silver Linings Playbook We all suffer tragedies in life. Break ups, abandonments, lost loved ones, and countless other bumps and bruises will take their toll on our hearts as we live. It’s so tempting...
Continue Reading