Oct 1, 2013

How To Know If Your Relationship Has Potential

You’re a few months (or years) into your relationship and you’re wondering whether or not this particular pairing has potential.

You feel like you’ve wasted time with past partners and you don’t want to make the same mistake again.

Well, you’re in luck.

Having counselled hundreds of people over the past decade and having interviewed dozens of successful long-term marriages in preparation for my next book, I have amassed a large sampling of information regarding the early signs indicating a potentially perfect match.

By determining the potential in your connection early on, you could save yourself from wasting time in unfulfilling relationships.

Here are some pointers to help you decide whether or not your relationship has potential.

1. You Don’t Feel The Need To Pretend

In the first few months of dating a new partner, it’s common to hide behind social masks. You’re both on your best behaviour.

“I shouldn’t call her for at least two days. Otherwise, she’ll think I’m too available.”

“I can’t sleep with him until after the third date. Unless I wait, he’ll think I’m easy.”

“She didn’t text me back fast enough so I’m going to ignore her for a few days.”

OH MY GOD, STOP!

Arbitrary dating games don’t serve you and you know it. Being playful, spontaneous, and challenging are great qualities in a romantic partner.

But playing hard to get will just make you hard to love.

In a relationship that has potential, you realize that you don’t need to hide behind social masks.

You don’t have to fake who you are in order for your partner to like you.  In fact, being yourself has never been easier.

You both bring out and encourage the best versions of each other with ease.

You feel like you, and quite likely, the best version of you that you’ve been in a very long time.

HappyCouple

2. You Do The Things Everyone Tells You Not To Do

There are tons of relationship no-no’s that common sense tells you to avoid in the courting process. But this relationship is different.

At the end of the first month, you’ve found yourself wanting to say that you love them. You want to introduce them to your parents “too quickly.” You’ve made plans for the two of you six months from now without a second thought.

No matter what your friends, family, and media tell you is the “right” amount of time to engage in commitment-y behaviour, you found yourself breaking all the rules- often without guilt or any weirdness.

Take this as a sign. This one’s a keeper.

3. Everything Is Different

The sex, the conversational chemistry, the ease with which you established a deep connection with each other… for some reason, everything about this relationship feels different.

She’s the first girl that you want to proudly show off to your parents and friends. He puts all of your past relationships in his shadow. You now realize why all of your exes are your exes.

Maybe committing to someone used to seem downright terrifying, but now you’re practically picking out names for your future children in your mind.

Maybe this whole “one person forever” concept isn’t too scary after all!

Still Not Sure If Your Relationship Has Potential?

If you still find yourself uncertain after reading these tips, you might need to stop thinking and start feeling.

Your emotions know better than your mind when it comes to love.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
8 Reasons You Won’t Attract A Conscious Man (As You Currently Are)
Mar 1, 2024
Jordan Gray
8 Reasons You Won’t Attract A Conscious Man (As You Currently Are)
Think you're ready for a relationship with a conscious man? The truth might surprise you. If you have been single for years, and yet you have the desire to be in a committed relationship with a man who meets you on all levels, there could be some unconscious blocks that are keeping you from attracting...
Continue Reading
3 Reasons You Date Emotionally Unavailable People (& How To Stop)
Mar 3, 2018
Jordan Gray
3 Reasons You Date Emotionally Unavailable People (& How To Stop)
Do you keep finding yourself dating emotionally unavailable people? Does it frustrate you when you find out that the person you’ve just started seeing is JUST out of a relationship… or that they want to move even more slowly than you’ve already been going… or that they’re emotionally constipated and...
Continue Reading
How To Find And Date An Exceptionally High Quality Partner
Sep 13, 2015
Jordan Gray
How To Find And Date An Exceptionally High Quality Partner
Looking to find and date a high quality partner? You're in luck! I recently wrote a piece over on Elephant Journal called “Marry A Man Who Knows How To Love Hard.” I described a man who is there for all of the inevitable what-if’s of life… who lovingly listens to how his partner’s day went… and who...
Continue Reading
The 12 Types Of Undateable Men
Jul 24, 2013
Jordan Gray
The 12 Types Of Undateable Men
There is a tricky transition from being a boy to becoming a man.  And through this process a lot of men don't make the full journey. Boy psychology is unaware of it's place in society, primarily self-interested, avoidant, and indecisive.  Boys are reactive and thrive in the role of the victim. Man...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate Guide To Attracting A Partner That Aligns With You
Jul 16, 2014
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate Guide To Attracting A Partner That Aligns With You
As much as my books and blog posts largely focus on how to be the ultimate relationship partner, I get asked by men on a daily basis how to meet and attract a quality relationship in the first place. Without further ado, here is what I have learned through 15 years of serial monogamy. While getting...
Continue Reading
What You Can Learn About Love From Watching 'The Bachelor'
Mar 5, 2014
Jordan Gray
What You Can Learn About Love From Watching ‘The Bachelor’
People are inherently lazy. We want to do as little as possible for the promise of maximum results achieved. Work out once a week and get ripped. Get rich while you sleep. Find your dream partner in a day. And while all of these things are certainly possible, they tend to require an initial...
Continue Reading