Humans are fairly predictable creatures.
Because of this, we crave a sense of differentiation.
We all want to be unique. We want to feel special. We want to believe that the rules that apply to all people don’t automatically apply to us.
But you know something…
It’s okay to be human.
And as a human, you should accept that, though predictable, there are certain fundamental facts about attraction that you just can’t ignore.
Here are the three timeless laws of attraction…
1. You Have To Be Sexually Attracted To Her
And I’m not even talking about “Yeah, she’s cute enough, I guess.”
You should be afraid of your attraction to your partner. In the early, infatuation stage of attraction, she consumes your thoughts. It might even feel like you didn’t have a sex drive before you met her.
You think about the last time that you had sex, and your body burns for the next time that you’ll get to do it again.
Her scent makes you dizzy… the sight of her lips makes you hard… and everything about her softness and vulnerability makes you want to protect her in every way possible.
Life is too short to be with someone that you aren’t ridiculously attracted to and proud to be with. You want to be distractingly, overwhelmingly attracted to your partner. Don’t shy away from it.
2. You Are Attracted To People Who Fulfill Your Needs
People need things. You have emotional, financial, and sexual needs.
As a social species, we rely on others to survive and thrive.
On a primal level, you only have two desires – keep living and keep making babies. So anyone that helps you fulfill those desires (or perhaps someone that only helps you practice the latter) makes you feel fantastic.
Want to keep living? Someone who buys or prepares food for you, shelters or makes a home for you, and protects or nurtures you will appeal to your primal desires.
Want to have sex (silly question)? Someone who makes you ache with burning desire, consumes your every thought, and makes you want to spend days on end in bed will appeal to your primal desires.
There are also secondary needs that a partner can meet- providing feelings of safety and security, ample encouragement (that helps build your self-esteem), connection and friendship (that comes from investing in your relationship). All these fulfilled needs can build on your initial primal attraction.
The bottom line is this: people that help you in your quest to become the most satisfied, comfortable, and self-actualized person possible are the people most attractive to you.
So if you have any hang-ups because you like that your partner helps provide for you, because she is an amazing outlet to help you with your emotions, or because you feel like a sex god when she gives you that look… lose the guilty feelings. Accept that you’re a human with needs. And realize that it feels fantastic having those needs met.
3. You Have To Put Work Into Yourself
But it isn’t enough to just put an adequate amount of effort into yourself. If you want a prize, you have to be a prize.
No one will ever speak up for you when it comes to your love life. And no one ever should.
Whether you are a man or a woman, you have to invest in your own growth. If you want to level up, you have to earn your way there. Nobody is born with amazing social skills in the same way that people aren’t born with chiseled abs or permanently-maintained hair styles.
You are already worthy of being loved just by being born, but by whom you are loved is largely up to you. You can put in zero effort and date the partner that no one wants, or you can grow yourself into the ultimate you that could ever exist and date the partner that everyone wants.
It’s unrealistic to say that your ideal match will wander into your life with no effort on your part. To become a prize, you must put in effort. There is no other way.
They Are Timeless For A Reason
Many people who win the lottery are in a worse off position financially one year after winning it then before they won. Why? Because it’s much harder to keep what you want than it is to get what you want. Anyone who hasn’t put effort into themselves can luck their way into a relationship with an amazing person, but it won’t last very long if neither partner is putting in any effort to maintain it.
Figure out what you want, work hard to achieve it, and then work just as hard to maintain it.
This applies to your bank balance, your lifestyle, your body, and your relationship. Don’t let the line go slack. There’s already enough mediocrity in the world and you don’t need to contribute to it.
Need help figuring out what you want? Want some guidance in achieving it? Feel free to reach out.
Dedicated to your success,