Mar 15, 2017

No More Settling

Seriously. That’s it. From today onwards, you’re making a vow…

No more settling in your love life.

No more settling for partners that don’t inspire you.

No more settling for partners that you don’t truly respect.

No more settling for partners who you don’t absolutely love having conversations with.

No more settling for partners who you’re hesitant to introduce to your close friends or family.

No more settling for partners who you don’t enjoy your sexual connection with.

No more settling for partners that don’t feel somehow magical in your eyes.

No more settling for partners whose scent you don’t adore.

You’re done. You’re finished. You’re through.

You’re breaking up with settling, for good.

No more making half-baked excuses for their behaviour, time and time again.

No more “You don’t know them like I know them”’s… your love should be apparent to all who know you well.

No more partners who you don’t enjoy kissing.

No more partners who don’t share your sense of humour.

No more partners who don’t inspire you to be a better version of yourself.

No more partners who aren’t willing to put in the kind of work into your relationship that you are.

No more partners who can’t meet you at the level of intimacy and emotional depth that you crave.

You’ve had a good run. You’ve enjoyed your empty sex, cried your tears over the lovers who barely deserved them, and experienced a variety of people as romantic partners… and now, you’ve reached the end of your line.

Draw a line in the sand, and honour it.

It’s time to step up into your fully aligned, bad-ass self.

The world needs you in all of your self-expressed glory… and that gorgeous heart of yours will only open all the way if you have the courage to allow yourself to be fully met by someone who is as amazing as you are.

Your dream partner is out there… and they’re just waiting for you to start being all of the things that you were meant to become.

No more settling in your love life. Period.

You’re ready. It’s time.

I believe in you.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
4 Bullshit Myths About Men
Sep 23, 2018
Jordan Gray
4 Bullshit Myths About Men
You know the old story… Men are sex obsessed, sports loving, money-providing, simple minded neanderthals… and women are talkative, career-tolerating, husband-seeking, baby-making machines. Stereotypes are super useful… if you’re a hack stand-up comedian. In the real world, stereotypes simply...
Continue Reading
How To Date Someone Even If You Are Married
Jan 15, 2014
Jordan Gray
How To Date Someone Even If You Are Married
The courting phase of your relationship shouldn't end just because you tied the knot. If you actively date your partner (the one that you are already with, of course), you will appreciate them that much more and your relationship will thrive. You know that investing in your relationship is important,...
Continue Reading
Help Your Partner Work Through Past Sexual Abuse In 3 Steps
Jul 6, 2015
Jordan Gray
Help Your Partner Work Through Past Sexual Abuse In 3 Steps
Although this is the first time I’ve written about it publicly, the issue of sexual abuse is one that is very important to me. I have had multiple friends and lovers who have had sexual abuse in their past (either early childhood or later in life) and, with the average statistic saying that 1 in 3 women...
Continue Reading
The 5 Best Books On Cultivating Healthy Relationships
Nov 4, 2015
Jordan Gray
The 5 Best Books On Cultivating Healthy Relationships
Sometimes I read a book and I’m like, "HOLY JEEBUS I AM TEN PAGES IN AND THIS THING HAS ALREADY CHANGED MY LIFE!" The following five books are some of my favourites of those kinds of books. Some of them primarily help you with your relationship to yourself (#'s 1, 2, and 3), and others primarily help...
Continue Reading
There Is Freedom In Commitment
Aug 12, 2018
Jordan Gray
There Is Freedom In Commitment
We fear that making commitments limits our freedom, when really, making the right commitments gives us more freedom than anything else we could do for ourselves. Allow me to paint a picture by contrasting two clients I worked with within the last decade. Karissa was terrified of...
Continue Reading
To The Perpetual Fence Sitters
Nov 17, 2018
Jordan Gray
To The Perpetual Fence Sitters
Here are three true short stories. About Tammy, Anna, and Joe.  (All names and any identifying details have been changed to protect identity.) Tammy Last week, a woman (who I will call Tammy) sent me a 1,000+ word email telling me about how she wanted...
Continue Reading