Jul 24, 2013

The 12 Types Of Undateable Men

There is a tricky transition from being a boy to becoming a man.  And through this process a lot of men don’t make the full journey.

Boy psychology is unaware of it’s place in society, primarily self-interested, avoidant, and indecisive.  Boys are reactive and thrive in the role of the victim.

Man psychology is structured, courageous, self-sufficient, decisive, and driven.  Mature men are proactive and accepting of responsibility.

And in the no man’s land between the boy stage and the mature man stage live the twelve types of undateable men.

Is it impossible for these types of men to get into a romantic relationship?  No, of course not.

Is it very likely that these types of men will never be able to be in a healthy, thriving relationship with someone that doesn’t also have a boat load of emotional issues?  Yes.

Without further ado, here are the twelve types of undateable men (that you can either avoid being, or avoid dating)…

1. The No-Getter

The No-Getter is unambitious, has no real direction, and is happy making minimum wage for the rest of his life.

Common secondary symptoms include lacklustre social life, poor cardiovascular health, and a distinct lack of stamps on his passport.

Who needs goals when you have microwavable food?

2. The Green-Eyed Monster

The jealous type that assumes the worst in their partners.

Green-Eyed Monsters are truly projecting.  They suspect you of cheating because they themselves are most often cheaters or semi-recovering cheaters (and so cheating is on their mind a lot).

3. The Power Starved Prince

The Power Starved Prince is constantly aware of the status dynamic in your relationship.  He does everything from the mindset of “Who is winning right now?”

It has been hammered into his head that women will lose respect for him if he does too many favours for them or appears “beta” in any way.

You’ll ask him if he could take out the garbage… “In my own time.”  You’ll ask if he could get you a glass of water… “Why? Are your legs broken?”

You’ll fight for every inch with this one and he really isn’t worth the headache.

4. The Entitled Boy

The Entitled Boy expects things to come easily to him in life, love, and work.  He believes that he “deserves” the best even though he hasn’t really earned anything.

He is often single, and unemployed (or “transitioning”) because he feels that every job and every relationship is beneath him.  Stay away!

5. The Self-Neglecter

Often found in his natural habitat of unwashed filth, playing video games while drinking out of cans or bowls (“All of the cups were dirty”).

The Self-Neglecter will do absolutely anything to avoid doing dishes, paying bills, or bathing.  Often has overlapping qualities of the No-Getter.  Basically, this guy just sucks at life.

Handsome narcissistic young man looking in a mirror

6. The Mirror Obsessed Narcissist

In many ways the opposite of the Self-Neglecter, the Narcissist spends way too much time on his own physical appearance.  Having a full time workout routine is one thing, but waxing your chest, having a three-step exfoliation process, and hiding mirrors around the house is what really takes this guy to the next level.

The Mirror Obsessed Narcissist finds it difficult to really value his partners feminine essence because he is too wrapped up in himself.

While taking care of yourself and having some self-respect are one thing, making your partner feel invisible is not an admirable trait for any mature man.

7. The Hot-Headed Man-Child

The Man-Child takes everything that you say personally and is quick to anger.

He is also skilled at manipulating you into apologizing unnecessarily (which you will gladly do just to get him to calm down).

Partners of the Hot-Headed Man-Child feel like they are babysitting more often than they are in a romantic relationship with a like-minded peer.

Suggest some anger-management and assertiveness training classes and then move on.

8. The “Nice Guy”

I’ve written extensively about this guy in the past.  Passive, manipulative, and a liar, the “nice guy” stalks his prey by lavishing his target with praise and favours in hopes of turning their fallacy of a friendship into a romantic endeavour.

This kind of guy should be avoided at all costs.  Wait until they learn how to be honest, set more personal boundaries, and express their true intentions before you consider a relationship.

9. The Know-It-All

This guy has to be right all of the time.  He can often be found spouting off random, boring facts about anything and everything at dinner parties as people try and get as much distance as possible from him.  The only way to get the best of an argument with this guy is to avoid it altogether.

He is truly masking his tender ego and is desperately seeking approval and validation from others.  Lives in his head, and fears living in his heart.

10. The Armchair Critic

The Armchair Critic judges everyone around him, but is doing nothing substantial with his own life.

He has an opinion on the life of you, your best friend, your cousin-in-law, and anyone else that doesn’t match his ridiculously high standards.

When you dig a bit deeper you realize that the Critic feels deeply insecure about his own shortcomings and manages to keep people from looking too closely at him by making them feel defensive.

11. The Court Jester

The Court Jester is goofy, uncomfortable in silences, and a people pleaser.

He wants to make sure that people are constantly happy, and has a compulsive need to keep the conversation flowing.

The major sign that you’re dealing with a Court Jester?  He can’t be seen as feeling anything but happiness.  When you ask them how they’re feeling, you will almost never hear anything other than “Great!”

They have a resistance to being seen emotionally and never want to ‘burden’ you with any form of negativity.

12. The Emotional Adolescent

Whether he has been burned in the past or not (who hasn’t?) the Emotional Adolescent has a deep mistrust of women.

Often uses broad generalizations about how women are gold-diggers, or are not to be trusted.  He has the phrase “Can’t live with them, can’t live without them” tattooed somewhere on his body.

The Emotional Adolescent is afraid of vulnerability, opening up to women, and thinks that women are out to get him.  Whether this stems from a past heart break, low self-esteem, or being brain-washed by cultural conditioning, this guy has some work to do on himself.

Let The Work Begin

By reading through and understanding each of these twelve types of pseudo-men, you may see pieces of yourself.  To a small extent, that’s totally fine… we all have some boy psychology in us and that is unavoidable and completely healthy.

Anything in it’s extreme form is unattractive.  The man who is made of pure drive with no sense of enjoyment or balance is just as unattractive as the no-getter.

But if you see yourself as word-for-word cases of one or two of these, you might want to do some major self-reflection and see how you can kick some of these old habits that will hold you back from truly finding love in your life.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Ps. If you enjoyed this article, you will likely also love checking out:

Being A Healthy, Balanced Adult Is Sexy As Fuck

How To Find And Date An Exceptionally High Quality Partner

The Differences Between Boy And Man Psychology

4 Honest As Fuck Questions You Need To Ask Yourself Often

How To Develop Your Masculine Edge: 9 Steps To Becoming A Beast

Blog

Related

See All
This Is The One Thing You Always Have Control Over
Feb 21, 2016
Jordan Gray
This Is The One Thing You Always Have Control Over
We really can’t control much of anything in our funny little lives. We grasp for control. We grasp for meaning. We grasp for a semblance of purpose in everything that we do. In my opinion, there’s only one thing that we can ever truly control. And I’ll tell you what that is. But first, a story. My...
Continue Reading
Does Polyamory Ever Work?
Jan 28, 2021
Jordan Gray
Does Polyamory Ever Work?
Does polyamory ever work? I received the following letter from a reader the other day. "I’ve been struggling for the better part of several months dealing with leaving my ex for the second time (who came back early last year love bombing me for months, then completely shifting saying he wants to...
Continue Reading
7 Powerful Trust Exercises For Couples
Nov 23, 2015
Jordan Gray
7 Powerful Trust Exercises For Couples
We all know that trust is a fundamental component of every healthy intimate relationship. But what is trust exactly? In the context of relationships, I define trust as having an underlying belief in the reliability and consistency of someone. So, for example, if you and your...
Continue Reading
3 Things To Do About Fear Of Your Partner Dying
Aug 1, 2020
Jordan Gray
3 Things To Do About Fear Of Your Partner Dying
My partner Demetra and I have lived together for a little over a year. We are committed to each other. We talk about getting married in the not-so-distant future. And each time our relationship has gone a layer deeper, we have both had a corresponding layer of fear accompany it. "What if she...
Continue Reading
12 Romantic Proposal Ideas For You To Steal
Apr 1, 2021
Jordan Gray
12 Romantic Proposal Ideas For You To Steal
So you’re ready to get down on one knee and tie the knot with the love of your life… Before we get to talking about ways to do it, let me grab my trumpet and set off some confetti cannons… Because that is amazing! (*Cue explosions and marching band*) The fact that you’re at a place in your relationship...
Continue Reading
I Used To Think That Men Who Got Married Were Idiots
Feb 25, 2021
Jordan Gray
I Used To Think That Men Who Got Married Were Idiots
I used to think that men who got married were idiots. Or, if they weren't idiots, they were at least undesirable enough that they just had to settle for whoever chose them... because why else would you tie yourself to someone for life if the reason weren't that you didn't have any other romantic options? I...
Continue Reading