Mar 25, 2014

How To Be A Beast In Bed - Removing Your Sexual Blocks (Pt. 3)

Sexual intimacy is just as much of an internal experience as it is an external one (if not more so).

The majority of people have some kind of hesitation, nervousness, or blocks around sexuality and it’s a normal and healthy process to be worked through with a trusted partner.

Here are three sexual blocks that people often take for granted.

Removing Your Sexual Blocks

be a beast in bed, dating advice for introverts, introvert dating, dating introverts, how to date as an introvert

1. Make Sure That You Like Who You’re Sleeping With

You’d think that this would go without saying, but it doesn’t.

Many of my clients (who are unmarried) often find themselves questioning whether they have something wrong with them sexually because they don’t find themselves responding to their partners very strongly when it comes to their sex lives.

One possible situation could be that the person you are sleeping with just isn’t very sexually compatible with you. As I’ve detailed in the past (in this article) our bodies know whether or not our partners are good sexual mates for us even if we don’t. Little hints in their saliva, vaginal fluids, and overall scent keep us away from (and keep us running towards) potential partners that aren’t as compatible as we once hoped. So listen to your body and intuition early on in the relationship. If you find yourself connecting well on a logical and emotional level, but the sexual attraction is really lacking, that might be something that you need to listen to before you take it any further.

2. Make Sure That You’ve Cleared The Air

Little arguments that get brushed aside in your day-to-day relationship have a stifling effect on your sex life.

The more muck you let build up between you the harder it will be to connect sexually.

Everyone knows that the communication channels need to be wide open if your relationship is going to have any chance of succeeding, and this is especially true when it comes to your sex life.

Are there big (or little) things that need to be addressed so that you feel more comfortable with each other? Set aside time regularly to have these space clearing sessions and your respective libidos will thank you.

3. Make Them Feel Desired

Different things open different people sexually.

It might make you feel more loved and desired if, when you returned home from work, your partner dropped to their knees and welcomed you with a *kiss*.

And maybe your partner is opened sexually less by random sexual access, but more by unexpected acts of romance. Fill the house with a few dozen of their favourite flowers and draw them a warm bath to let them unwind in.

You never know how much they’ll love it until you try. So try!

In part four of this series you will learn what exactly to do during sex to become a fully integrated beast in bed. Check out parts 1 and 2.

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
What Six Months Of No Drinking Did To My Sex Life
Aug 11, 2015
Jordan Gray
What Six Months Of No Drinking Did To My Sex Life
I’ve never been a heavy drinker. Even in what many people consider to be the prime drinking years of 19-25, I rarely got drunk. From 19 onwards, I probably got drunk an average of five times per year, and more recently, I would maybe have an average of 3-5 drinks per month. But something still didn’t...
Continue Reading
How To Increase Sexual Desire For Your Partner
Feb 15, 2015
Jordan Gray
How To Increase Sexual Desire For Your Partner
Sexual desire for your partner ebbs and flows depending on your mood, the season, and how much effort you’ve been putting into your relationship lately. It’d be all too easy to blame waning sexual desire on the fact that you’ve been together for X number of months/years/decades… but really, sexual desire...
Continue Reading
How To Get The Slight Edge In Your Relationship
Aug 22, 2015
Jordan Gray
How To Get The Slight Edge In Your Relationship
Have you ever heard of the book 'The Slight Edge' by Jeff Olson? It's one of my all time favourite self-help books that I re-read every year or so. It isn’t a problem if you haven’t read it… since I’m about to summarize the whole book into one sentence. The basic premise of The Slight Edge is that… Small,...
Continue Reading
Start Slow To Make Your Relationship Last
Feb 11, 2014
Jordan Gray
Start Slow To Make Your Relationship Last
We live in a world of instant gratification. Want this package shipped across the country by tomorrow? $20. Want to eat some delicious bacon? Microwave this for five seconds and voila! Want to find true love? You can find a partner by next weekend. But can the speed at which we rush into...
Continue Reading
The Most Challenging 48 Hours Of My Life (A Year In Review)
Jan 1, 2014
Jordan Gray
The Most Challenging 48 Hours Of My Life (A Year In Review)
I was at one of the lowest points of my life a year and a half ago… I was depressed, unfulfilled, and having frequent panic attacks. I was in a relationship that drained me, a job that I resented, and felt incongruent with who I was and what I was doing. One morning, I woke up and decided that...
Continue Reading
5 Questions To Ask Your Partner For Better Sex
Aug 2, 2015
Jordan Gray
5 Questions To Ask Your Partner For Better Sex
Sex doesn’t get talked about enough. The word ‘communication’ can be found in 99% of modern relationship advice/literature… but it’s rarely to do with our sex lives. It’s usually focused around dissolving conflict, going deeper in your relationship, or expressing jealousy. All of which are totally valid...
Continue Reading