Jul 7, 2016

7 Ways To Set Up Your Bedroom For Better Sex

Want to set up your bedroom for better sex, more relaxation, and more connection with your lover?

While we can exercise our willpower to a certain extent in our lives, our environments often shape our realities to a greater degree. So instead of having to overcome the lacklustre vibe in your bedroom to initiate sex, why not have the sexiness and luxurious appeal of your bedroom inspire you and your partner into sexy times with ease?

Here are the seven highest leverage things that you can do to set your bedroom up for better sex.

1. Make your bedroom sacred

Your bedroom should be untouchable by the outside world.

It’s hard to shut off your brain and focus if you feel like you might be interrupted. So how can you keep any and all interruptions at bay?

– Put a lock on your door

– Invest in some heavy duty black out curtains (the kind that can shut out light and sound)

– Keep your phones off and out of the room

– Make sure that there’s no TV in the room

Remember, your bedroom should only have two purposes: restful sleep and deeply connecting sexual intimacy.

2. Invest in scents

Scents matter. Whether you’re using them to relax your mind after a busy day at the office, or using them to wake up and energize your senses for morning sex, investing in the smells of your bedroom will pay dividends.

Pick up an essential oil diffuser and/or some lightly scented candles with scents that both you and your partner agree upon.

Heres a cheat sheet for some calming scents and invigorating scents…

Relaxing scents: lavender, vanilla, jasmine, pumpkin, tea tree oil.

Energizing scents: orange, lemon, citrus, rosemary.

3. Keep your bedroom at a slightly cooler temperature

When it comes to the sexiness of your bedroom, the temperature definitely matters.

If it’s too cold then it might limit the number of positions you can do because one or both of you will be too cold to want to take the sheets off. If it’s too hot then the male partner may have a more difficult time maintaining a quality erection.

This is a matter of personal taste but for better sex (and higher quality sleep) a temperature of 67-70 degrees Fahrenheit/19-21 degrees celsius is generally best.

4. Keep massage oil handy

Sensual massage is one of the most efficient ways to get out of your head and into your body while simultaneously connecting with your partner and engaging in some light foreplay.

Pick out your favourite massage oil from a local swanky sex shop, or use coconut oil.

(Bonus: coconut oil doubles as a massage oil and a lubricant)

control, slow sex, set up your bedroom for better sex

5. Own soft, quality sheets

Are you an adult? Great! Then you should probably own a set of quality, high thread count sheets that your body enjoys coming into contact with.

Avoid buying white sheets because, believe it or not, white sheets show stains. Which will inevitably happen if your sex life is fun at all.

What’s better than white for your choice of sheet colour? Consider green or brown for a relaxing earthy tone. Or, for the uber-practical person, consider red sheets (helloooooo period sex)!

6. Have your favourite sexy time music cued up

Music and sex both tap into very primal parts of our brain, which is why the two go so well together. It might sound like it has the potential to be cheesy… but don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. The right music can add a whole new swagger to your mattress mambo.

Choose whatever makes you feel the sexiest.

Sexy R&B? Old school rock? Melodic dubstep? Instrumental Spanish guitar music? Whatever floats your boat.

Pick up a set of quality speakers, cue up your expertly cultivated playlist, and let the sweet tunes carry you further into your body.

7. Have your favourite sex toys within reach

While your lips, hands, genitals, and tongue have a lot of versatility inherent in them, it’s also fun to have some quality sex toys on hand to occasionally bring your sexual play to new heights.

Have you experimented with vibrators together? You should! This is the best one for clitoral stimulation, and this one is the best for fitting into smaller spaces.

Ever wanted to engage in some light rope bondage? It’s more fun than you might think.

Did you know that there are some amazing male masturbators on the market these days? This is my favourite one.

Let’s Get It On

So that’s that.

Make your bedroom sacred, keep it at a slightly lower temperature, have high quality sheets on hand, and invest in the scents, sex toys, and sounds that surround you.

Implement these seven tips into your increasingly luxurious boudoir and you’ll be enjoying some of the most deeply connected, playful, explorative sex of your life in no time.

Did you enjoy reading this? Then you might also love checking out…

  5 Sex Toys That Every Couple Should Own (Seriously)

Supercharge Your Sex Life (video course for men)

5 Questions To Ask Your Partner For Better Sex

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
5 Powerful Ideas You Can Use For Valentine’s Day
Feb 3, 2015
Jordan Gray
5 Powerful Ideas You Can Use For Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day is coming up soon… do you know what you’re going to do for it? Whether you celebrate the holiday with a significant other or not, these five powerful ideas will be good ones to keep in your back pocket for future use. If you are celebrating the holiday, please, please, please avoid...
Continue Reading
5 Empowering Beliefs About Sex For Women
Nov 12, 2024
Jordan Gray
5 Empowering Beliefs About Sex For Women
Ever felt like there’s more to your sex life than what you’ve been told? If so, you’re not alone. For many women, beliefs about sex have been shaped more by external pressures and societal expectations than by personal truth. Many of us carry ideas about sex that don’t serve us, beliefs that limit...
Continue Reading
How To Increase Sexual Desire For Your Partner
Feb 15, 2015
Jordan Gray
How To Increase Sexual Desire For Your Partner
Sexual desire for your partner ebbs and flows depending on your mood, the season, and how much effort you’ve been putting into your relationship lately. It’d be all too easy to blame waning sexual desire on the fact that you’ve been together for X number of months/years/decades… but really, sexual desire...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate Guide To Thigh Jobs (& 11 Sexy Thigh Job Positions)
Jul 22, 2024
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate Guide To Thigh Jobs (& 11 Sexy Thigh Job Positions)
Thigh jobs...? You've heard of handjobs and blowjobs... but thigh jobs? For many people, they are a foreign concept. Also referred to as thighing, thigh sex, and intercrural sex, in a subset of kinksters, explorative couples, and people saving themselves for marriage, thigh jobs are all...
Continue Reading
The Ultimate BDSM Guide For Beginners
Dec 6, 2018
Jordan Gray
The Ultimate BDSM Guide For Beginners
If you’re looking to wander in to the mysterious world of BDSM for the first time, then this article is for you. Kinky sex is wickedly alluring for many reasons. It breaks cultural taboos, pushes your erotic comfort zone, and potentially leads to thrilling peak experiences, which are otherwise inaccessible...
Continue Reading
7 Things All Men Need In A Relationship
Dec 11, 2013
Jordan Gray
7 Things All Men Need In A Relationship
Men are often reluctant to talk about their deepest needs in intimate relationships. Whether social conditioning or an inability to communicate our needs are to blame, men (who tend to be the less communicative partners in intimate relationships) are prone to silently suffering when their emotional...
Continue Reading