Oct 8, 2017

This Is Your Life Purpose

To feel alive…

This is your life purpose.

Spend time with people who make you feel alive.

Eat food that makes you feel alive.

Do work that makes you feel alive.

Spend your money on experiences that make you feel more alive.

Do things that make you feel alive.

If the answer is so obvious, why don’t more people feel more alive? Why do we live in a society filled with ample living-sleepwalkers? What keeps us from feeling alive?

Several things…

1. Repressed emotions.

We have repressed emotions clouding up our bodies and minds.

Stored sadness. Forgotten anger. Relationships that we never fully grieved. Old hurt that we are in denial of.

You move this energy by feeling it. As the old cliche goes… you have to feel it to heal it.

Feel your sadness. Move your anger. Feel all of your feelings fully, and you will feel more embodied… more complete… more alive.

2. You are out of alignment in your career or relationships.

If you do work that that you can barely stand… or you spend time with people that you don’t love, like, or respect, then, sooner than later, you will start to feel dead inside.

Aliveness comes from alignment.

That’s an important one… so I’ll say that again… aliveness comes from alignment.

Honour the things that your heart tells you to do. Spend time with your favourite people. Play more often. Follow your fucking bliss.

Or, as Howard Thurman once so wisely said, “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

You are going to die one day. I promise. So stop wasting your time on shit that doesn’t matter to you.

3. Secrets that you have made special in your mind.

We’re only as sick as our secrets.

If you have an abundance of secrets trapped away in your mind… guess what, they’re slowly killing you. They’re eroding your joy, your self-esteem, and your sense of connection with other people.

The first step? Acknowledge that you are holding on to secrets.

The second step? Confess them.

Tell your closest, trusted friends the things that you hold on to about yourself.

Tell them that you have hatred towards men/women. Tell them that you shoplifted when you were younger. Tell them that you used to be addicted to something. Tell them that you were raped. Tell them that you wished your other parent had died instead. Whatever is real for you… simply confess it.

Deploy the necessary courage and just do it. It will be challenging, but it will be worth it.

Once you reveal your dark, inner thoughts your ego won’t be as able to convince you that you’re especially bad/unloveable/broken/flawed/etc.

Expose your mind. Enjoy deeper connection with others. Come alive.

4. Old guilt and resentments that you hold on to.

Guilt is how your mind makes you wrong. Old resentments are how you give your power away to others in your mind.

Let go of beating yourself up for past self-perceived wrongdoings. You did the best that you could with who you were at the time. Like everyone is doing, always.

Let go of old resentments that you have towards others. It isn’t serving you anymore. Forgive them as a gift to yourself. It’s time.

5. You don’t allow enough room for rest and play.

Your body is so wise.

You have built-in mechanisms of recovery just waiting to be switched on when you allow yourself the time and spaciousness to rest.

One of the best ways to rest in an active way? Play.

More than any other species, humans are creatures of play.

Play is also essential to our well-being. As Dr. Stuart Brown once said, “The opposite of play isn’t work, it’s depression.” In other words, we NEED play in order to thrive.

So bust out a pen and a piece of paper and write down what you did for fun from the ages of 6-16… and then go do more of those things on a weekly basis.

It isn’t too late to reclaim some space in your life for your inner child. He/she has been looking to come out for a while now anyways. It won’t require much coaxing.

Dedicated to your success,

Jordan

Ps. If you enjoyed this post, you will likely also love reading:

How To Fully Release Difficult Emotions That Hold You Back

21 Of The Best Self Care Practices Ever

How To Get Rid Of Your Repressed Anger

Play Away Your Anxiety with Charlie Hoehn (video)

Jordan Gray
About Jordan Gray

Jordan Gray has been a sex and relationship coach for over 15+ years, with his work reaching over 200 million people worldwide. His writing has been featured in Vogue, GQ, The New York Times, Cosmopolitan, Women’s Health, and countless other publications around the world. When he’s not working with 1-on-1 coaching clients or writing a new article, he’s most likely to be found reading, chopping wood, or spending time with his wife on a little island off the west coast of Canada.

Blog

Related

See All
3 Reasons Why You Don't Actually Have Commitment Issues
May 28, 2013
Jordan Gray
3 Reasons Why You Don’t Actually Have Commitment Issues
We live in a problem-centric society that wears it's issues like badges of honour. People are quick to label themselves and others with these badges because it's hip to be messed up (ex. Jersey Shore, Texts From Last Night).  It gives people a sense of importance to be able to talk about their struggles. Several...
Continue Reading
3 Reasons To Make Jealousy Your Friend
Apr 4, 2013
Jordan Gray
3 Reasons To Make Jealousy Your Friend
3 Reasons To Make Jealousy Your Friend We're told from a young age by friends, family, and society that certain emotions are "bad" to have. Depending on your culture and upbringing, pride, sexual desire, and jealousy are feelings that often have a bad reputation. Every emotion is...
Continue Reading
The Pattern Gets Louder Until You Listen
Oct 9, 2016
Jordan Gray
The Pattern Gets Louder Until You Listen
Whatever pattern is trying to make itself known to you in your life, it will keep getting louder until you start paying attention to it. Have you ever had a pattern repeatedly offered up to you to learn from, but as you ignored the initial warning signs, the pattern’s only option became making itself...
Continue Reading
Your Value Is Not Your Body
Jun 27, 2017
Jordan Gray
Your Value Is Not Your Body
Your value is not your body. Your value is not tied in to how well you make love. Your value is not your gorgeous ass, or your perfect lips, or your perfect hair. Your value is not your fancy adornments, or biceps, or the lack of or presence of a thigh gap. Your value is not in your weight, shape,...
Continue Reading
7 Ways NoFap Improves Your Relationship (And Your Life)
Jul 16, 2020
Jordan Gray
7 Ways NoFap Improves Your Relationship (And Your Life)
Think your chronic masturbation habit could be negatively impacting your relationship? Well, you may be right. And you’re also not alone. If you don’t spend much time on internet forums, you probably missed the millions of men who have already been sharing their struggles in love and sex, and...
Continue Reading
10 Reasons To Work Out That Have Nothing To Do With Looks
Jun 8, 2019
Jordan Gray
10 Reasons To Work Out That Have Nothing To Do With Looks
Regular exercise has been proven time-and-time again to be one of the simplest, most important things anyone can do to create superhuman health, longevity, and brainpower. But, as trends in gym memberships show year after year, it also seems to be the hardest habit to develop and stick with on a regular...
Continue Reading