Magazines and the internet are filled with bad blowjob tips.
And not just bad like mildly sub-par…
I mean bad like, “If you do some of these things you could do permanent psychological damage to him” (especially tip #4).
But how do we know which tips are worth their salt and which ones are worse than useless?
You could do your own scientific research by testing out the various theories on dozens of partners.
But why do all of that when you could just hear directly from someone who has worked with tens of thousands of men, from all around the world? (Hi – that’s me!)
Today, I’m going to dive into nine of the most unfortunately common bad blowjob tips that I keep seeing pop up in magazines and on the internet.
If you steer clear of these nine specific tips, you’ll be in a far better position to bring him the greatest pleasure of his entire life.
Let’s begin!
9 Bad Blowjob Tips You Should Absolutely Ignore
1. Focusing only on the tip
In case you missed that day in sex-ed class, the head of the penis is made up of the exact same material as a woman’s clitoris.
And just like focusing exclusively on a woman’s clitoris (to the exclusion of the rest of her vulva/vagina/body) would be unpleasant, so it is with solely focusing on the tip of his penis.
I mean, sure, you might be able to get him to climax by only focusing on the head, but the orgasm (if it happens at all) will be overly localized and his climax will be entirely superficial.
If you focus just on the tip, it is highly likely that his penis will either become overly sensitive and he’ll have to stop, or that he’ll start to go numb and will have to stop. And in either case, him experiencing something unpleasant enough that makes him have to say, “Umm, babe… I need you to pause” doesn’t exactly scream best blowjob of his life.
So what should you do instead? Focus on the head, the shaft, the balls, his thighs, etc.. You don’t give somebody a rapturous, whole-body orgasm by focusing on one square inch of flesh. You do it by interacting with his whole body.
2. Be rhythmically consistent
Many women believe (or are told) that in order to satisfyingly bring their man to orgasm with a blowjob, they need to be consistent. They need to do a consistent thing, with a consistent rhythm, otherwise he’ll lose ‘momentum’ and the whole thing will be a complete and utter failure.
Well, I have great news for you…
This is not only not the case, but the opposite is closer to true.
Doing the exact same thing for too long is more likely to make him go numb than make him cum.
And engaging with his penis in a way that utilizes variety (of stimulation, pace, and pressure) will likely bring him to orgasm faster and more powerfully.
The erroneous belief that men need super consistent touch and rhythm is one that women come by honestly. Because most women need a consistency of touch and rhythm to reach orgasm, they would naturally assume (or have been explicitly told) that men work the same way. But in my experience of working with tens of thousands of men, the opposite holds much more truth.
Hopefully this registers as a huge wave of relief to you!
You switching things up, or needing to take a short mouth break will not have his orgasmic climb screech to a halt. In fact, it could get him there faster. So worry not! Variety is not only the spice of life, it is also the.. spice of… blowjobs (ehh, you win some you lose some).
3. Focusing too much on actually sucking
It’s true, people often refer to oral sex on a man by saying things like, “sucking his dick.” But that doesn’t mean that you actually need to do much (if any) sucking.
In fact, you can get through an entire blowjob with zero suction, and it won’t impact the blowjob one bit.
So if the belief that you need to add suction to every mouth stroke is adding unnecessary jaw tension and pressure into the whole process, great news, you can drop the suction thing entirely and he likely won’t even notice.
(Want to learn how to fall in love with giving blowjobs? Check out this bonus video interview featuring my wife and I, from our Queen of Blowjobs program, on this exact topic.)
4. Slapping his penis to desensitize it
If you’ve seen any mainstream porn produced in the last 10-20 years, you’ll likely have been introduced to this little gem before.
It’s one thing that this practice is so rampant in a lot of porn, but it’s a whole other thing to actually put it in advice columns.
Let me say, clearly and definitively, I promise you that the vast, vast majority of men do not want their penises slapped. Either as a desensitizing tool to have them last longer, or as a pleasurable thing to throw into the mix. Smacking one of the most sensitive parts of someone’s body is the opposite of pleasurable.
Of course, there are billions of people in the world and it is entirely possible that you are with a man who does enjoy this. If that is the case, he will tell you that he likes it. Never assume that it is common practice that men enjoy.
Got it? Good.
5. Chocolate sauce/whip cream/maple syrup on his penis
If you’ve ever read a Cosmopolitan-style ’55 Blowjob Tips To Blow Him Away’ article, you’ve inevitably seen bad blowjob tips like these.
While I fully understand that whipped cream, chocolate sauce, and maple syrup are delicious foods, and the concept might sound at all sexy, in reality, it quickly turns into sticky pubes and a big mess.
Not only that, if the blowjob you’re doling out is just a pit-stop towards vaginal sex, you’ll have a high chance of a yeast infection with any residue of these food products going into your body. It’s best to just steer clear.
6. Champagne/Soda pop in your mouth for the bubbles
Similar to the previous food-based tip, trying to explore new sensations via carbonated bubbles in your mouth might sound fun, but in practice, it is cumbersome and anything-but-sexy.
I mean, just imagine filling your mouth with any liquid, and then trying to slide a cylindrical object in and of it without having any of the liquid leak (or shoot) out.
For this oft-peddled blowjob tip, the juice is not worth the squeeze.
7. Putting ice cubes in your mouth
Sensitive, highly aroused penis head… meet ice!
Ah yes, of course! The exact thing that an engorged penis wants to be directly pressed against is a frozen, rigid chunk of ice! How brilliant!
Again, this highly common, bad blowjob advice sounds mildly interesting on paper. But in practice, it’s just straight up uncomfortable.
By all means, if your partner wants to experience a cool sensation on his cock, then take a swig of a cold drink, swallow it, and then take him into your mouth. Nice, cool effect, that lasts for an extended moment. But ice is an entirely unnecessary level of cold to directly apply to an erect penis.
Bottom line? Leave the ice in the freezer. I promise you his penis isn’t dreaming of being a stir-stick in your frozen tundra mouth.
8. Treating deep throating as a to-be-worked-towards necessity
In general blowjob advice, there’s a consistent through line of people talking about deep throating like it is the be-all-end-all blowjob trophy to be earned.
Allow me to go on the record in saying: it definitely isn’t.
If you (like most people) are unable to deep throat, that is completely fine. If you have zero desire to even attempt anything near deep throating, that is also completely fine. Or, if you want to, but you have a girthy partner and are unable to, that is also fine.
Deep throating is a rare party trick that a tiny percentage of people can do, and I can confirm that you are entirely off the hook, and it is not needed.
To easily simulate the felt experience of deep throating, simply use your two wet hands on the majority of his penis shaft while you use your mouth on the head. Voila! No gagging required.
9. The idea that the blowjob is a bust unless you swallow his cum
Another commonly touted expectation in the bad blowjob tips section of your favourite magazine, is that blowjobs almost don’t count unless you swallow his cum. Which of course is all kinds of wrong.
Maybe you’re in a newer relationship and you don’t want to swallow his cum because it feels too intimate.
Maybe you hate the consistency, experience, or taste of it and it makes you gag.
Or maybe you have an empty stomach and you know that swallowing it makes you feel queasy.
Whatever your reason, it’s valid.
Besides, there are so many other fun and sexy things you can do with cum that aren’t swallowing it.
As just a short sampling of options, you can:
– Use your hand to finish him off and have him cum on your breasts, stomach, or butt
– Have him finish in your mouth and then let it drool out down your chin and/or onto your torso and then smear it around with your hands
– Let him use his hand for the last moment and have him finish on your face or breasts
– Allow him to finish on his own stomach, and then lovingly clean him up with a warm, wet hand towel
– Have him cum in your mouth, and then you can spit it ten feet across the room at the cum bullseye/archery target you set up earlier that morning, thereby massively impressing him with your long-range accuracy
Remember, a blowjob is still pleasurable even if you do not have him cum in your mouth or swallow it.
A blowjob is only fun when both partners are enjoying themselves. So don’t swallow his cum (or feel guilty about not swallowing his cum) from a place of obligation.
Want Better Blowjob Advice Than The Above Tips?
Want to learn beneficial blowjob tips that actually help you?
My wife Demetra and I recently created a powerful course together called Queen of Blowjobs. Over 1,000+ women from all around the world have gone through it and seen amazing results.
Want to give your man the most life-changing, passion-inducing, wall-shaking, neighbour-waking blowjobs of his entire life? I strongly recommend checking it out. You can find out more about the program by clicking here.
Dedicated to your success,
Jordan
Ps. If you enjoyed this article, you’ll also love checking out:
– Queen of Blowjobs (video program for women, that teaches you how to give your man the most incredible blowjob of his entire life)
– Bring Him To God: Advanced Handjob Mastery For Women (video program for women, that helps you bring your man to sexual heights he has never experienced before)
– The 8 Sexiest Positions For Blowjobs
– The 18 Sexiest Handjob Positions To Blow His Mind
– Inside The Male Mind (video program for women, teaching you all about the secret fears, desires, and needs of men, and the nuance of what actually drives them in life – so you can have the best relationship with them possible)
