Giving a world-class, life-changing, heart-opening, neighbour-waking blowjob is easier than you might think.
With a few simple tricks in their back pocket, anyone can upgrade their fellatio game from mediocre to masterful.
You might be reading this to prepare for his birthday, your anniversary, making a first impression, or just out of general interest (and if this is the case, bless your heart). Whatever the reason, this in-depth walkthrough will cover everything you could possibly need to know on how to give your man the best blowjob he’s ever had.
After reading this, you’ll be miles ahead of the rest of the population on blowjob I.Q. The rest comes down to how you use it.
Speaking of which, before we even touch on anatomy, technique, or logistics, let’s talk about the key secret that will unlock the highest tiers of this experience. Because armed with the treasure map and all the right touches, anyone can be “good”. But there is an often overlooked foundation that will elevate your oral into the realm of epic-ness.
Blowjob Necessity #1: Your Attitude & Mindset
By far, the biggest factor in giving a phenomenal blowjob is the attitude you have toward giving it.
Basically: You have to genuinely love what you’re doing.
Because what a man’s bodily arousal will respond to is the wild, primal energy and genuine desire that you bring. He wants to feel your own pleasure and enthusiasm. With this as the base note, any techniques you add over top will blow his mind and eternally take the mantle as the best blowjob he’s ever had.
Even if you knew nothing about anatomy and technique, but simply went down on him like a voracious (and loving) animal, he would be utterly jaw-dropped and left fantasizing about you for months to come.
To get an intuitive sense of what I’m talking about, picture this:
You’re making out with a guy and his hands are placed loosely on your hips, as he casually kisses you sweetly. When you move to having sex, he’s over top of you monotonously humping while staring blankly through your chest (or with his face buried in your neck) in silence. He finishes, rolls over, looks at the ceiling, and says, “Man, I needed that. Thanks,” before getting up to use the bathroom.
WOMP WOMP…
Now picture that encounter but supercharged with energy:
While making out, he’s pressing his body into yours as his hands ravenously explore and squeeze everything they can find. His hunger for you is palpable, and he’s growling and dirty talking in just the way you like, telling you how he’s been dying to taste you and be inside of you all week.
He picks you up and throws you on the bed. While making love, he’s rapt with pleasure, relishing in how good your body feels as he varies depths and intensities of penetration. His gaze switches between piercing through yours and taking in every curve of your body. He watches and listens to how you respond to every touch and stroke, amplifying your pleasure at every turn.
In every micro-moment, you can feel that his attention is completely on you. Like there’s nowhere else in the world that he would rather be. Your scent is intoxicating to him and he is getting high on your beauty.
While rocking in and out of you, he finally gets so overwhelmed that he tells you he just can’t hold back any longer, and ejaculates all over your stomach and breasts. He collapses, kisses you, looks into your eyes and says, “My god, baby, you are so fucking amazing.”
Notice the difference?
Yeah, he can too. This carnal wildness that makes sex transcendent and so wickedly hot is the secret ingredient we’re talking about here. The key word here is totality. Really showing up fully in the moment and bringing your full presence to it.
In blowjobs (or oral in general, for that matter) this is especially important because the receiver sits back while the giver becomes the single point of action and source of sexual energy.
So, imagine that having his cock in your mouth felt like the highlight of your day, as though it were an honour to pleasure him this way, and allow yourself to send pleasure into his body from that place.
To help yourself make your enthusiasm feel more genuine, you may have to do one (or more) of the following:
- Ask him to groom just the way you like, and wash well. You absolutely deserve to ask for this. Especially given that you’re being so amazing as to put in the effort to give him this experience. Many women don’t care that much about men’s pubic hair. But if it turns you on when it’s trimmed short, ask him to do so.
Don’t feel awkward about asking him to wash up either. It all depends on how you say it. If you tell your man to, “go shower up and rinse the day off so I can devour every inch of you,” that has a very different attitude than, “wash your dick or I’m not going anywhere near it”. Done the right way, he’ll be smiling and giddy as he prepares himself for you.
- Set the scene. Make the setting sensual and inspiring. Get the lighting, temperature, smells, and music all just right. Our environment has a heavy influence on our internal states of arousal.
- Understand this as deep personal work. Unleashing the kind of energy we’re talking about is legitimate psychological work. Liberating your sexual energy impacts every other aspect of your life. It makes you feel more sensitive, vibrant, flowing, assertive, and confident.
From many conversations with female clients and friends, I understand that this is often easier said than done. A lot of women feel inhibited and self-conscious when it comes to really unleashing. Maybe sexuality was shamed in them somewhere along the line, or they’re afraid of looking silly.
It can feel very vulnerable to step into your power, especially sexually, with your lover. You feel exposed in a risky way. But when that feeling is really embraced, it turns into exhilaration. That’s where this whole experience becomes even more fun for you as well.
With the key inner piece covered, let’s get into the outer map of his parts.
Male Anatomy: The Glossary Highlights
Here are the key parts of his genitals that will be relevant to the best blowjob experience. To make it easy for you, to figure out what to focus on, I’m going to give each of these a sensitivity rating from 1 to 10.
(Side note: I drew the following chart myself, so I apologize to any artists who are offended by my terrible drawing abilities)
The glans (aka the head – 9/10) is the darker bell-shaped part at the tip of his penis. This is where the majority of your focus and attention in terms of stimulation is going to go. Think of it like the tip of your clitoris (which it’s essentially the anatomical equivalent of, just less sensitive).
The foreskin (6/10) If he’s uncircumcised, his penis will still have one, which looks like a high turtleneck on a sweater. Its extra hood of skin at the end of the penis that protects the glans. When erect, it will naturally pull back most of the way to expose the glans. We’ll talk about how to work with it later on.
The frenulum (10/10) is on the underside of the glans. It’s the thin piece of tissue that connects the skin of the penis shaft and to the glans itself. This is another highly sensitive part that’s good to focus on.
The shaft (4/10) is the cylindrical bit extending the glans away from the body, which we usually consider to be the penis itself, since it’s the largest visible part. It has little to no acute sensitivity, but general pressure and squeezing feels great, and it can handle a LOT of that. This is where stroking and grip comes in. In other words, the ‘top’ third of the penis has the vast majority of the pleasure receptors, and the rest of the shaft has the remainder.
The testicles (8/10) (or testes) are the two egg-shaped little dongles hanging beneath the shaft. This is where his sperm is made and stored. They are kept inside of…
The scrotum (7/10) which is the skin that forms the pouch around the testes. Don’t let its appearance and function deceive you. The scrotum can actually be deliciously sensitive on most men.
(Side note: The vas deferens (10/10) are the tubes hooked up to the testicles that shuttle sperm into the prostate to be mixed with semen and prepared for ejaculation. These are good to be aware of because they are VERY sensitive, as well as the spot where they attach onto the testicles. And I don’t mean sensitive in a pleasurable way. These are best treated with CAUTION. Avoid pinching, twisting, or yanking them.)
The anus (9/10). Aka “the butthole.” This is an optional area to include later on in the session. Simply massaging around the opening, or circling a finger just inside can be a spine-tingling addition to the experience. It’s also the gateway to the prostate, which I’ll cover in the forthcoming “Advanced” section.
The perineum (7/10) is the pad of flesh between the scrotum and the anus. As he begins to warm up, this area becomes very responsive to a bit of massaging touch or use of the tongue. Partially because the skin is sensitive, and partially because the prostate is sitting just on the other side. This also makes for a great bridge to anal play as well.
Now that you know what you’re working with, it’s time to set the stage.
Beginning: Tips On Foreplay
To maximize the efficacy of the actual blowjob and make it stand out more, it’s absolutely imperative to use foreplay techniques to create buildup and sexual tension. This will fully prime his engine, mentally and physically, which results in a much stronger orgasm when the time comes.
Foreplay also extends beyond the time you’re actually even together. For example, if you have this in mind for a date night, your foreplay could start by sending sexy pictures or texts in the day(s) leading up to the blowjob itself. Then when you’re actually together, you would begin working in the aspects of physical touch.
Also, I hate to partition this as “foreplay” and something separate. Because this is all a crucial part of the delicious feast of pleasure you are bringing to your favourite man. There is no such thing as “before” and “after” when it comes to sexual play. It’s just one big extended sensual dining experience, with multiple courses.
Every stage counts – from setting the table, to serving the appetizer, savouring the main course, and relishing in dessert.
(That said, with the “slow-and-steady” route as the standard, sometimes you may not want to take it slow and just start by taking him into your mouth right away – if you’re in the mood – which can also be a super hot surprise. Giving the best blowjob possible is all about following your own sexual fire to customize the experience for what feels right for you.)
Prime his whole body. Don’t just focus on his genitals. Involve everything. Wake his body and nervous system up. Get the blood flowing. You might breathe on his neck and ears as you lick them sensually, or kiss your way down his chest. You can gently trace your fingers over his arms, chest, stomach, thighs, and groin.
Generally, beginning with gentler touch and escalating is a good strategy. But follow your passion to pepper in some hard squeezes and dig your nails in every now and then. Men find it incredibly hot to feel your pure desire coming through. So make sure you’re doing whatever feels honest and exciting in your body.
You might even consider beginning with a light body massage, or starting with a few tips from my penis massage article. But for the default best blowjob, I’d advise you to avoid getting too wholesome and “chakra healing” about it.
More often than not, maintaining that wild, dripping-wet, animalistic, “I’m a strip-teasing-sexual-goddess” vibe is the sweetest spot to be in. But obviously you and your partner will have to find your own shared groove with it all (through communication).
When you’re ready to move to actually touching his penis, begin to work in some strokes and squeezes of his penis over top of his pants. Once you’ve made this contact, it’s a perfect place to introduce the next point.
Dirty talk. To amplify the anticipation in this stage, bring in some dirty talk to crank up the heat and convey your sauciness (if you feel a little shaky in this area, click over to my ultimate guide for beginners when you’re finished here.) Physical touch helps get the body going, while sexually charged dirty talk works on arousing the mind.
Some simple rules to keep in mind for dirty talk are:
- During foreplay, tell him what you want to do
- During the act, tell him what you like
- Be as explicitly descriptive as you can (think “naughty > nice”)
You can do this while straddling him, or as you kneel down in front of him for the first time. You might tell him that you can’t wait to feel him in your mouth, what you love about his cock, that you’ve been thinking about it, or that you can’t wait to taste it, or swallow his cum.
As you progress, keep your communication going. You don’t have to carry a conversation. But use your sultry voice to take note of what he likes, or tell him what you’re enjoying. Something simple like, “Oh baby, just holding your cock is making me so fucking wet…” drives him wild because you’re not just dirty talking, but also expressing your arousal and love for the moment, which is what he really wants to feel. That you’re as into it as he is.
Changing locations. As you’re teasing, kissing, and undressing, consider using location changes as a way to enhance the experience. There’s something about involving multiple places at different stages that spices up the experience and takes it to another level.
Think of how most couples are in the earlier phases of relationship. Most new couples don’t segregate sex into just the bedroom. They follow spontaneous passion, rather than routine. They might start making out in the kitchen, and go down on each other on the countertops, then moving to a comfier surface to lay down on from there.
For example, you might start out with foreplay on the couch. Then right before you reach the moment of taking him into your mouth, or after a few minutes of doing so, you keep the tension going by bringing him to the bedroom to continue from there.
Of course, he’ll still be thrilled if you do this all in one spot. It’s just another potential piece of the equation you might want to experiment with.
First touches. Once you’ve got his cock out, don’t rush. Take your sweet time and tease him before taking it into your mouth. Again, this is a general tip. You can follow your energy in whichever direction you like. But much of the time, building tension and delaying pleasure (even if only by a few seconds) is a winning strategy.
Try lightly stroking his upper thighs while you kiss the areas around his penis. Use a featherlight touch with your fingertips to slowly brush his scrotum or perineum. Then move your kisses to the same place, and up to the glans. You might lick him up and down the length of his shaft for a minute, and flick your tongue across his frenulum, before properly putting him in your mouth.
Eye Contact. Part of embracing your wildness is not being shy. Especially when you’re getting lower and lower down on him, flick some occasional eye contact his way. There’s a happy medium here. You don’t want to stare at him the entire time without blinking. He will enjoy watching you get lost in the moment while you do your thing. But no eye contact at all is also a lost opportunity. It could be for a few seconds at a time, maybe no more than 3-5, unless you’re speaking to him.
With that, you have the options of where each of you will be when this all goes down.
The 5 Best Blowjob Positions To Experiment With
When you’re into the full swing of fellating, there is an array of options for both the giver and receiver’s enjoyment. To make it easy, I’ve narrowed down my favourite ones below, particularly from the man’s perspective.
1. The Pivot
With the man laying on his back, the woman places herself perpendicular to him at a 90-degree angle – either propped up on her knees or fully lying down.
This is a ridiculously hot position for him for a bunch of reasons.
From here, he can easily caress, stroke, and squeeze his favourite parts of your body, or slide a finger inside you. He gets to see nearly every inch of your curves and face, while you can make some intermittent eye contact.
He’s able to fully relax his body and feel every single subtle ripple of pleasure that courses through his body. Meanwhile, you can also comfortably stroke his thighs and massage his perineum or anus.
2. King’s Chair
This is one of the best blowjob positions because it emphasizes the power dynamic that’s part of what makes receiving a blowjob so enjoyable for some men.
With the guy sitting up in a chair, the woman kneels between his legs, where she also has ample access to his thighs, perineum, and anus.
If you especially want to make him feel honoured and served, this is an excellent way to do it. Using that note of making a little eye contact in this position is INSANELY hot.
While this whole experience is technically for him, I did say that your pleasure is the most important factor in stoking his own. So, if you want to bring a vibrator into the mix, or play with yourself while you pleasure him, this is a perfect opportunity to do so.
3. Standing Service
This is a blowjob classic. Like the last position, it brings out the power dynamic well. It’s where the man is standing fully upright while the woman is on her knees in front of him.
Standing up has its advantages and drawbacks. On the plus side, it feels hot for both of you, and he can become a little more actively involved by thrusting into your mouth/throat. It’s also an extra hot vantage point for him to ejaculate onto you from.
On the negative, it’s not a position he can fully relax into, since he has to activate his leg and glute muscles. Doing this ends up diminishing the overall sensation and depth of orgasm, if he has one here.
4. Doggy Style
Like regular doggy style in penetration, the man is on his knees with the woman on all fours in front of him. But of course with her turned around and using her mouth instead of vagina.
This carries the same positives as the last position, where the man can thrust a bit, if he wants to, and enjoy the super hot feeling of being serviced. Because he’s exerting less effort to hold himself up, he will also feel a lot more sensation in this position and be able to have a stronger orgasm.
The only drawbacks are that your eye contact is limited, as well as the intensity with which you can work with your hands and mouth, due to the angle and need to use at least a hand or elbow to prop yourself up.
5. The Lie Back
In this position, the woman lies on her back with her head hanging just off the side of the bed. The man stands, or kneels, at the edge and penetrates her throat. Here, the man has most of the control, while the woman can bring her hands in to add supplementary stimulation.
This one is a huge turn on because he gets to be in control while getting an ultra sexy and flattering view of your body. He can also stroke your breasts or stimulate you from here as well.
Note: If you have a super sensitive gag reflex, you’ll want to exercise caution here, because this position is ideal for deep throating (I’ll also cover how you can practice to change that a little further down in this article). But if you stay in communication, you can both deeply enjoy this while he either stays just inside your mouth, or slowly tests the waters while moving deeper. Consider making your “that’s too much” signal a simple squeeze of his thigh.
Foundational Blowjob Tips
With a well-lubed hand stroking up and down on the bottom two thirds of his shaft, take the remaining third into your mouth (where most of his sensation is.) Keep your lips in a light “O” shape to protect your teeth from coming into any contact (avoid doing this at all costs!).
Occasionally, you might take him out of your mouth and lick his frenulum (his most sensitive part) or keep your tongue placed there while you continue stroking. When doing this, try moving your tongue side to side, in circles, or flicking it.
Don’t forget the rest of his genitals too. While you keep stroking, you can move your mouth further down to lick the scrotum at the base of the shaft, which often feels amazing as well. You might lightly take either testicle into your mouth and fondle it with your tongue (but check with your man as to whether or not he likes this, because some men are too sensitive for this and it can hurt them).
At the same time, with the tip of his penis free, you can move your stroking hand higher up to work the glans and frenulum for maximum stimulation.
While using the main movements of the basic techniques, you can also use your free hand to play with his testicles and scrotum, using a light undulating motion and subtle pull. This is like adding a bunch of bass to a great song. It rounds out the whole feeling and adds a strong bottom note to his overall sensation.
I want to take this opportunity to say that being inside your mouth isn’t actually the BEST and only part of a blowjob. The term “blowjob” itself makes it sound that way, but really this is just about providing epic genital pleasure with your hands and mouth. More often, the most acute sensation will come from your licks on these other parts – like the scrotum or frenulum – while being inside your mouth paired with stroking is a sure-fire way to finish him off.
So, be free to explore!
Variation. Mix it up a little, but not too much. You don’t want to play one note for the whole song, but you don’t want to jump around too fast either. Pleasure builds as you keep steady with one thing at a particular intensity. Let yourself explore him as you please, but hold in each place for a while to see how he responds. You might try the same thing for 30 seconds to a minute at a time.
From here, you can choose take it to the next level.
Advanced Techniques For The Best Blowjob Possible
Add suction. To increase his pleasure (and the amount of your mouth’s surface area that is touching his cock) add some suction, like you would if you were working on a popsicle. It’s something that happens in the middle or back of the mouth, rather than at the front. You can try this now by placing your tongue against the roof of your mouth and creating a vacuum. The front of your mouth and tongue should be able to stay completely relaxed, while the back of your tongue presses and sucks upward. This creates for a nice effect while he’s inside your mouth.
Don’t swallow any saliva for the duration of the blowjob. For the entirety of the blowjob, you can choose to let your spit run down all over him and make his cock/balls/anus super wet. There’s something fantastically naughty about letting it all get so messy. Partially because it shows your wild intensity, but also because it’s just plain dirty. Plus, it looks super hot when you pull away and you leave trails of saliva connected to his cock before rubbing them back in.
The tongue twister. When you have his glans in your mouth, try swirling your tongue in circles around it. At the same time, you can work in some rhythmic suction and slight movement in and out. Combined with stroking and other hand play, this is a back-archingly deadly combination. It may take some experimenting to get the hang of.
Anal massage. Unless he has explicitly told you that he doesn’t like this (which is something you’ll need to talk about, since most people don’t just volunteer this information out of nowhere) it could be the ingredient that sends your blowjob into the stratosphere.
You’ll want to make sure his anus is as wet as possible, which is where the aforementioned saliva trick can come in handy. Otherwise, keep some silicon lube or lots of coconut oil with you. This is something you would introduce in the last half or third of the blowjob. Before then, he might be too sensitive – in the wrong way – or not aroused and open enough for it to feel pleasurable.
When he is ready, this will crank up the pleasure and send him over the edge harder than he ever has in his life.
When you’re both ready to work it in, start by using a fingertip to massage around the outer ring of his anus. Very slowly work your way to the centre and put just the tip of your finger in, about one knuckle deep. From here you can trace small circles, or rock back and forth. This will help relax the anus while providing a ton of pleasure.
If you really want to go all the way and involve a prostate massage, you can check out my deep dive on that here.
General Tips to Make Your Blowjobs Even Sexier
- The element of surprise. Surprise him with the timing and location of your blowjob. For example, when he gets home from work, lead him into the bedroom, lean him back on the bed, and start blowing him. You could also pop in while he’s showering.
- Use your free hands. So much pleasure is already brought by your mouth, that it’s so easy to do the simplest things with an extra hand to spice things up. Besides paying attention to his stomach, legs, balls, or anus, don’t hesitate to play with yourself either. So long as you don’t get too distracted, it will likely make his head explode from overwhelming sexual charge.
- Make some noise. While women have strong kinesthetic and mental triggers for their sexual arousal, men tend to be more visual and auditory. Making vocalizations while you’re pleasuring him, like moaning, or throwing in an “Mmmmm”, will drive him wild.
- Borrow from BSDM. If you want to bring in a kinky vibe, you can play with the Dom/sub dynamic. You could call him sir, daddy, or whatever your pet name would be. While kneeling, you could place your hands behind your back and ask him what he wants you to do, then only doing what you’re instructed to, while asking him if that’s what he likes.
- Get creative with your foreplay. To make the event stand out, you could choose to do something unconventional. That might mean using an ice cube to tease his cock, or something light like a feather. Leading up to it, if you’re telling him in advance to build tension, you could use your phone to send him a calendar invite to a sexily-named event (like ‘HIS NAME coming in my mouth…’ or ‘Daddy’s favourite sexual pastime’), or , so he has it in his schedule to look at and remind him. He’ll smile every time he sees it.
- Dress up. This could be as much for you as it is for him. Because the outfits we choose to wear have a very real impact on our attitude and energy. Choosing the right pieces may get you in a sexier headspace, while massively turning him on at the same time. It could be a new set of lingerie, or something to play out a specific fantasy – like the classic sexy teacher/librarian/schoolgirl look.
Q&A On Deep Throating
Many women have asked me, “Can I/should I learn to deep throat?”
My Answer: Yes, it is possible for anyone to learn how to deep throat. However, you shouldn’t feel any pressure to do so. Contrary to popular belief, deepthroating isn’t actually as physically pleasurable for guys as many other blowjob techniques. The back of the throat does create some nice pressure, but it’s more the idea of deepthroating that’s hot for most guys.
There are also some men who don’t like it at all, and would prefer to just have your wet hand(s) all over him. So, check in with him to see if he actually wants this from you, or if this is just a message that porn put into either of your minds.
But if you DO want to learn deep throating, it’s going to best be done progressively. The sensitivity of each person’s gag reflex is wildly different, so it will be easier for some than others. But it’s a knack that anyone can develop.
The best way is to practice with a toy (I recommend something softer and less rigid, like a silicone dildo.) Using your saliva, make sure it’s well lubricated before insertion. When it’s all prepped and ready, gently place the tip at the back of your throat. From here, do your best to slowly and progressively relax and open your throat.
Taoist sexual philosophy says that the back of a woman’s throat has some deep similarities to the cervix. They can both feel tense or painful at first, but when you do the work of relaxing, processing your emotions, and opening your heart more deeply, you can not only lessen the pain/gag reflex, but you may actually come to experience intense levels of pleasure from it.
For example, my partner gets so wet from deep throating and going down on me that her juices will literally drip down her legs while in the act, even when she isn’t being touched at all.
So, just because you’ve had an over active gag reflex in the past, it doesn’t mean that it’s a static thing that can’t be changed, whether that’s to make deepthroating simply tolerable or wildly arousing.
One final deepthroating tip. If you take one of your thumbs and squeeze it in your other four fingers (like a fist, with the thumb on the inside), this temporarily dampens your gag reflex. I don’t know why this works, but it works. Try this out the next time you’re brushing your teeth and want to brush the back of your tongue.
Try squeezing your thumb in a fist-shape, and you’ll notice that your gag reflex is way less sensitive. The human body, ladies and gentlemen! Pretty neat, huh?
(But remember, the best blowjob, for most men, is mainly wet hands all over his genitals, with some mouth, as opposed to just ramming him into your throat over and over, with little to no hands. But, as always, calibration is king. If insure, check in with him, and see what actually feels best for him.)
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How To Finish Him Off
When you can tell his pleasure is nearing the point-of-no-return, or he explicitly tells you that he’s about to come, this is where one steady technique will be perfect. For example, you might speed up your stroke and intensity of suction.
At this stage, if he’s truly close, you should be able to give it everything you’ve got without worrying about tiring out, as he’ll be finishing quite quickly. To help guarantee that’s the case, encourage him vocally with moans and dirty talk like, “Yeah, baby, cum for me, fill my mouth, I want to taste your cum.”
As his arousal is building, working the auditory angle is sure to make him cum faster and harder.
Then comes the question of, “What should I do with his cum?”
Well, either of your personal preferences here will win overall. But popular options are:
- You can have him cum in your mouth and swallow it
- Have him cum in your mouth and then spit it out (like in a nearby sink or garbage can)
- Have him cum on your body, face, breasts, or his stomach.
Ultimately, the majority of men prefer if you swallow because it subtly communicates that you deeply accept and desire him. Imagine if he was going down on you and stopped every other minute to spit out your fluids that were in his mouth. You probably wouldn’t feel very sexy and accepted.
If you really don’t enjoy the texture or taste of cum, but you still want to give him the experience of swallowing, there are a few tricks you can use to make it happen.
As good ol’ Mary Poppins said, “A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.” If you dread the texture and flavour of ejaculate, keep something liquid and sweet within arms reach. That could be a small glass of honey, coconut water, kombucha, or a small glass of bubbly wine.
When he’s getting close to coming, take a swig of your elixir of choice. You can either coat your mouth and swallow it first, so it becomes the dominant flavour, or leave it sitting in your mouth so it mixes together with his ejaculate (the best option if you’re extra sensitive).
This way, you’re also left with a good taste in your mouth – so to speak – about the whole experience, and feel good about wanting to do it again.
Once he begins ejaculating, he will suddenly become overly sensitive to any touch. As he does, slow right down to a snail’s pace with both your mouth and tongue. Once he’s finished, a few light, slow licks or kisses might feel amazing along his shaft and around the glans. But this is the point where you can relax and switch to stroking his legs or stomach (wiping off your hands on the bed first if they are covered in saliva), and asking how it was.
Blowjob Mistakes: What Most Women Do Wrong
If you’re a little overwhelmed by all of the steps and details and possibilities, don’t worry. Everything here is just a collection of notes and options for you to play with. To keep it simpler for some, it might help you to just focus on a few key things to avoid. Just taking note of some common mistakes will go a long way to ensure a fantastic experience.
- Lack of energy. As mentioned earlier, the most important thing to focus on is the energy you’re bringing. The most common weak-point in a woman’s oral game is that she doesn’t enjoy it enough, or doesn’t broadcast her enjoyment of it. It might feel like she’s doing it out of a sense of obligation, or routine, which isn’t something that anyone wants to experience.
- Lack of pressure. Using too light of pressure with your mouth and hands (unless intentionally done for effect) can leave him feeling unsatisfied. As mentioned, it’s best to build up the intensity and start light. But that shouldn’t be the whole dynamic.The penis is super tough and can handle a ton of pressure. Well, not literally a metric ton… but as much as your hands and mouth can apply. Plus, he’s used to masturbating with intensity. That’s not just because of bad habits. It genuinely feels good. When a man receives an under-pressured blowjob, it creates a deep feeling of dissatisfaction. Like he has an itch you’re scratching a few inches too far to the right, or sitting down to a meal starving and only being served a side salad. Imagine if he played “just the tip” with you all night while you desperately wanted him deep inside you.
- Using teeth. This part of the mouth should play basically no part of any blowjob. Intentional nips can be super hot. But there should be no collateral grazing happening whatsoever.
- Ignoring the balls. It’s fair that you wouldn’t expect the balls to be as sensitive as they are. But now that you know, don’t neglect them. A blowjob without ball-work is kind of like listening to a juicy song with no bass, or low end. It leaves a big piece of potential sensation off the table. When you bring it in, it rounds out the overall stimulation nicely and enhances everything.
- Being too boring/predictable. No matter what, I would be grateful to my lover for being willing to go down on me, and love and appreciate them for it. At the same time, blowjobs are just not that exciting when they’re done “nicely” and gently, the same way each time, with no added context around them. This is where those foreplay tips to create buildup and tension make a huge difference, as well as variations in technique. This point applies to both sides in regards to our sex lives as a whole.
- Diving in too fast. It’s hard to say this is a “mistake,” because sometimes it’s a great strategy. But think about it like this: The great majority of the orgasms and genital stimulation most men have is from masturbating on their own. And the habits they use to do so is usually a “full throttle” approach, without any teasing or warming up.
Having you jump straight to stroking and putting him in your mouth is nice, but most of the time it feels kind of unceremonious. But when you interrupt his known pattern by coming in with a slower approach and teasing touches, it’s already a super novel and arousing experience.
The Best Blowjob Of His Entire Life In Summary
The fact that you’ve just gone through this already guarantees that your man is about to receive one of the best blowjobs of his entire life, from one of the most amazing women out there. Because few of us ever receive deep-dive education from the opposite sex on how to operate and stimulate each other’s equipment.
If we boil down everything we’ve covered, giving him the best blowjob of his entire life comes down to:
- Priming your sexiest self and bringing your wildest energy to the table
- Starting off slow with creative foreplay, potentially hours or days in advance (in the context of sexting/dropping hints), then slow, teasing touches when you’re actually getting down to business
- Using variations of techniques, positions, and locations
- Paying attention to all of his genitals and the entirety of his body
- Communicate your arousal through dirty talk and sexy sounds
- Finish strong with intensity and vocal encouragement, and slow right down once he comes
- As a bonus, ask if he wants a warm towel, or a drink, or anything at all to wrap up.
Inevitably, your man will be the one on his knees, bowing in worship to the absolute goddess that you are.
Thank you for investing this much energy into your sex life, and giving him the best blowjob possible. Your partner thanks you, I thank you, and the men of the world thank you.
Dedicated to your success,
Jordan
Ps. If you enjoyed this article, you will also likely love checking out the following bonus resources:
– Inside The Male Mind (video course for women)
– The 3 Biggest Reasons Men Love Blowjobs
– How To Give A Life-Changing Penis Massage (aka Lingham Massage)
